Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

I really meant to take a before picture, but it would have meant me breaking my long-standing policy of not having a picture of myself on the internet that includes one of my arms fully extended in front of me taking my own picture. SO. At 1 p.m. yesterday my hair looked basically like this:

Okay, there was a little bit of a post-workout ponytail bump, and the wind wasn't quite blowing it ever-so-gently, but I said 'basically'.

So at 2 p.m. yesterday, my hair looked like this:

(I am resisting the urge to fix everything about this picture -- believe it or not, my hair is the same color in both pictures...).

Yes, I went short. I cut it fairly short a few years ago, but it's been long for a LONG time. Thinking about this makes me realize I still haven't told the story of my friend Denise coming to my house when Troy was out of town and I had lice -- and combing out my very long, very thick hair for lice. I think celebrating my short hair will be the time to tell THAT story of friendship -- not just anyone would do such. That may be tomorrow's blog. I know your are giddy with anticipation.

When I mentioned that I was getting my hair cut short, one person asked me if I was going to get a 'mommy-'do'. Um, no. Here's the deal: most women want to BE moms, and I am eternally grateful I was given that gift. Precious few of them want to LOOK LIKE one, and I am included in that group. Sorry, it's just the reality. (You can send hate email to: u-no-u-r-1-2@mommydo.com) I did not get a 'mommy-do'. I got a "I'm too s*xy for my hair" 'do!!

Like most things in life, cutting my hair has made me think about lots of things. That's for later too. Today was just show-and-tell for two reasons: 1) I hate when my hair is noticeably different and people feel obligated to say how fabulous it looks. See it here, say nothing later. We're both happy. 2) Now you will know who Troy is sitting next to in church from across the way.

And, when I walked Riley home from school, we realized that now HE, my 11-year-old son, wins the prize for longest hair in the family. We don't even have a long-haired DOG!

To all of you that thought this was going to be something great -- sorry, this is as big as it gets at my house!

Chicken or the Egg, Cart or Horse?

I've written about this verse before, so I've obviously read it before! I just love how God uses scripture again and again to teach, enlighten, and sharpen me.

So yesterday I was reading through my Face to Face book (a praying-God's-word book of awesomeness) and it came to a prayer regarding Philippians 2:14 and 15:

Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe.

I get that God wants us to do everything without complaining or arguing, so that we shine like stars in the universe. But I hadn't (until yesterday) caught on that we are supposed to do everything without arguing or complaining so that we may become blameless and pure.

Well, wait a minute...! I have been putting that verse on my 'to do when I am blameless and pure' burner. You know, with fasting and loving my enemy and stuff. We can't really be expected to do that stuff while we're still figuring it all out, can we? I'm supposed to believe that not complaining or arguing can have me become blameless and pure?

Well, if this is to be believed, it sure can. That, friends, is what Paul Faulkner used to call "Fake it 'till you make it." It may even seem to be 'inauthentic', which would lead some folks to say, "Well, I have to be honest about how I feel." Well, maybe you don't. Perhaps your momma was actually being scriptural when she told you, "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all."

I believe that is the fruit called 'self control'.

I've got some work to do about keeping my mouth shut. Maybe, just maybe, I will eventually become blameless and pure!

I've Become the "Other Woman"...

I have frequently requested a weather forecast for my church. Not for the town the church is in-- for the auditorium. I have suggested a running scroll on the website: "Current temp in the auditorium is 58* and breezy. Dress accordingly." or "High of 84* in the auditorium today." I have yet to be heeded.

Yesterday it was 58* and breezy. On Easter Sunday. The children were precious in their Easter finery and blue lips. Ashley and I were in spring-ish type clothes, but not sleeveless. We were quite cool. I didn't mind the cool too much while I interpreted the first part of the service, but once I sat down I got quite cool quickly.

I was sitting next to Troy, Ashley was on the other side of him. He finally put his arm around her trying to warm her up a little. I sure would have liked that warm arm around me, but I made do tucking as much of myself under the other arm at his side trying to warm up. Eventually, he leaned forward to remove his jacket.

"Good plan," I thought... "Leave your arm around Ashley, and give me the jacket -- or vice-versa, whatever. I'm good." Oh, no. He handed Ashley the jacket so he could have both of his arms back.

Let me be honest -- I sat there shivering. And beaming. It pleased me to sit by while Troy took care of his girl the way she needs to be taken care of. I want my daughter to know her daddy is crazy about her. As she seeks out a husband, I want her to know how she should be treated and know what it's like to be the apple of a man's eye.

It isn't impossible to understand the love of God -- well, as much as we can understand it on this planet -- without having a loving parent. But I do believe that me having loving parents helped me start to get an idea about the unconditional love of God -- and I want Ashley to know that as crazy as we both are about her, it's just a tiny drop compared to the abundant, never-ending, perfect love of her heavenly Father.

I spend plenty of time shivering for her while watching tennis, I don't mind a little more shivering while her daddy takes care of her. It's why I picked him.

Good Things Out There

Pray-shus.

Trey rocks out loud. I haven't met his wife, Lea, (yet) but she appears to also rock out loud. Awesome.

And Susan? Susan rocks out loud on stage. This post really spoke to me about a way that our Lord was so human the week of Easter. What an awesome message.


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Quote for the Day

"There is no pit so deep that God's love is not deeper still." -- Betsy Ten Boom

Good Friday

Why do we call it good? Oh, when I think about the events of that horrific Friday that Jesus was crucified, I can't imagine calling it 'good'. But Sunday? Man! What a wonderful day. Well, it's everything I base my faith on -- a risen Savior.

I said yesterday that I've been in a bit of a 'dry spell' spiritually. A dry spell of my own making, I might add. God is faithful and God is still my Savior and Lord -- I'm just wandering a little and He's letting me. I seek Him out when I wander, so I end up right where I should be, I suppose.

Part of my dry spell has to do with my erratic schedule. I talked about that recently, as well. But part of my busy schedule has been writing for the newspaper, which is fine. I have actually come to enjoy that WAY more than I expected to -- I HATE to talk on the phone and, well, I have an erratic schedule! But I have so enjoyed hearing what others are passionate about and wouldn't God have it that I have gotten several assignments about the Lent and Easter season.

A few weeks ago, I was assigned this article about Lent. It was such a blessing to me to talk to people whose minds were focused on the time of sacrifice and centering on God.

Last week I turned in this article about an AMAZING production locally (that is also this weekend if you would like to see it). Not only did talking to each of the folks that I interviewed bless me immensely, but I ended up taking my family to the production last weekend. It was heartbreaking and humbling and victorious and wonderful. And the people I interviewed? Every last one reminded me -- "the script changes, but the story is the same -- it's the gospel that we want the community of Abilene to hear". How precious...

I did an article (that I can't find online) about a family at my church and it just blessed me to hear of the generations of traditions and family memories this family has.

My final Easter season article is this one. It doesn't go exactly like I think my editor thought that it would. But, oh, how wonderful to talk to ministers across the town and hear that each of them are burdened with getting the message of the risen Savior to as many people as possible.

Besides blessing me with each of those articles, God also blessed me with a lighter writing schedule for a few days, so now I have a moment to take it in. Now I'm thinking back on how God gave me many opportunities to speak of my faith with people across many faiths and be reminded why I believe what I do. God put people in my path to remind me of His love for me, and why I'm crazy about Him in return.

Yes, the miracle of the cross is huge -- everything, perhaps -- in my faith. But to know that God used some 'mundane writing assignments' to bring that miracle back to the forefront of my brain is more than I can bear right now.

Oh, I am abundantly blessed.

Celebrate our risen Lord!

More Sitemeter Info

More fascinating (or not) Sitemeter info: I have also found that one of the most popular searches that brings people to my blog is the phrase "It's Friday, but Sunday's Coming". That is a well-known speech that Tony Campolo made (and has made several times) regarding the week of Easter.

I wrote a post with that title 3 years ago -- when my little punkin' friend, Levi, was born on Holy Thursday. (and now the crying commences)

I'm somewhat feeling that way again -- a little lost and aimless in this fallen world. It's amazing to me that, though it varies every year, Easter seems to come just when I need it the most.

(and in the middle of writing this, I get the evil eye roll from one because I threw away a review sheet of a test that has already taken place -- and the sheet was to be turned in for a grade. *sigh* Whatever)

More tomorrow on how God has used some of the annoyances of the past few weeks to bless my socks off. Because tomorrow is Friday, but Sunday's coming.

I can't wait...

Some 'Housekeeping' Business

First, please pray for Trinity. Her parents put her to bed after fighting a cold Saturday night and couldn't wake her late Sunday morning. Her acid levels are high as if she drank antifreeze -- but they don't think she ingested anything weird. Just don't know. Pray and pray some more.

Some of you have asked how I know who comes to my blog. I don't know specifically, but I can make some educated guesses. If I REALLY wanted to know, I could pay for a service that would tell me which COMPUTER visited my blog. Freaky, right? I use a service called sitemeter. It's very interesting for tracking traffic trends for my blog. WHICH can become a total obsession if you let it! Sitemeter can tell me the city of the SERVER that your computer uses (my server is in a little town outside of Abilene, I've learned!), it tells me what time you clicked onto my blog and how many 'pages' you visited while you were here (when you go to the comments, it counts as a separate page). The most interesting thing, though, is the referrals. It tells me if someone clicked on a link anywhere on the internet that brought them to my blog.

That is how I found out that Janie, and Dr. Butner, and Carrie (who was my BFF in 4th grade and recently happened across on facebook -- how weird is THAT. Oh, and she has the cutest blog!) all have links to me in their sidebar/ blogroll for which I am grateful! (Y'all -- I know I need a blogroll. Someday I'll get to that!) There are a few others that I can't think of off the top of my head, but I didn't know those folks knew I EXISTED until I saw that they had linked to me. That's really cool.

That's also where I can find out that people landed on my blog by googling for 'hammy downs' (oh, yes, they did....) or their local cult or my name. I have a friend that doesn't ever remember how to get to my blog -- I suspect she's my Abilene person who googles my name and blog. Very funny.

There are other options to use for this information, and if you have a Wordpress blog it tells you some of it automatically (Wordpress users, what info do you get from your traffic reports?)

In the post about "borrowing"/ stealing another's words or information, Warren brought up an interesting point about video -- or, more specifically, posting a video on your own blog that you saw on another. First, Warren, I agree with the first part of your statement -- what's so hard about just linking and saying: "I really liked this." The person who posted my stuff said s/he wanted a family member to know how they felt and my words summed it up best. Which is very flattering! But, still... a little credit, folks!

But video? What do you all think? I confess that I saw that video on... someone's blog and now I don't remember which one? I think it was Dr. Butner's? But since I was ABLE to embed it -- post it in my blog from the youtube server -- I consider it 'public domain'. Would it have been NICE of me to mention where I got it so that you, too, may go see all the clever and funny things that person posts? Absolutely! Was it stealing for me to NOT give credit? I don't THINK so, but this is certainly a gray area that I am happy to receive a little guidance in!

While I'm being a walking (typing) Public Service Announcement, let me tell you about a tool I recently started using. A recent Reader's Digest article talked about preventing (or being aware of) cyber-bullying, where someone (not always kids we've learned!) trash talks you or your child be it true or not. They mentioned that one way to be aware of what is 'out there' about either is to sign up for Google Alerts. Google Alerts are emails automatically sent to you when there are new Google results for your search terms. So, if you set up a Google Alert for your child, you will receive an email when someone posts something to the internet with their name on it. I signed up for all of my family -- all I came across unawares was a comment Ashley had made to her youth group's blog. Whew! But I'm thankful to have one more tool on my side to know what is out there. More info about Google Alerts here (seems it would also be useful for research, etc.)

I'm out of useful information! Anyone else want to share? :-)

Some Tuesday Fun

Y'all I am OUT. I have nothing fun, or thought-provoking, or enlightening today. I am simply drowning in deadline this and scurry here and get this done. How 'bout you?

It doesn't encourage me much to know that by looking back at previous years' blogs, every April is the same. What's odd is that my children have changed sports, but April still seems exactly the same.

Since everyone has a different laundry need of what MUST be washed be cleaned, we've done 12 loads of laundry (okay, maybe 3, it just feels like 12). Oh, they all NEED stuff clean, they just don't need anything folded/ hung. That's my job. Laundry RARELY is anywhere but the hamper or laundry room at this house and it is currently strewn all over my living room. It's clean and now folded and on hangers and waiting for some laundry fairy (that better not be me, too) to put them where they belong.

Can anyone relate?

So, I have no great thoughts, but I have a fairly amazing video. It's fairly long -- 5-7 minutes. Watch the first 60 seconds, then you can skip about 3 minutes. It just gets more and more amazing. Can you imagine the amount of time it takes to practice for something like this? I bet these girls' moms have laundry all over their house, too.

This was taken at the Naval Academy -- the military guys go wild over this!

Hmmmm...

Last week my sitemeter told me something else interesting. One of the pages that referred someone to my blog was a blog I'm not familiar with. This happens occasionally -- I might go visit and find out that I am linked on a blog roll or in a post. I try to make a comment, because I am honored for folks to think enough of me to send their readers my way.

So it was that last week I went to this previously-unknown blog and found where I had been linked. I was linked because the blogger was confessing (last May) to have stolen one of my posts and posting it as his (her? I'm not sure) own. Hmmmm.

The REALLY interesting thing about it is that blogger was confessing and asked forgiveness of the people who s/he had deceived, but I am still waiting...

This isn't the first time I am aware that something like this has happened, but I still don't know what, if anything, to do about it.

I somewhat tongue-in-cheek say I am waiting to be asked to forgive. A) If I haven't now, 10 months later, I never will. B) I have forgiven, but would prefer for this not to happen again!

As a writer, my words are my business. They are the only product I have to offer.

It helps to know that the ones that are worth stealing come from the Lord and He may do with them what He will. May I respond the way He would have me respond.

This will happen again as I post my words, my 'business', on the world wide web. Photographers can watermark their photos -- I can't watermark my thoughts and words.

May the words He's given me stretch far and wide to do His will, no matter how it gets out there.

Good Things Out There

I attend a Church of Christ. I was raised in a Church of Christ. It is a dear and precious family to me -- that I am occasionally hesitant to confess that I am a part of. We have some ugly baggage dragging around and not great PR on occasion. Trey posted something that truly blessed my soul. The church where I currently worship is also trying to define ourselves in the positive as opposed to what we DON'T do or DON'T believe.

The 'alternative lifestyle' folks have done a MUCH better PR job than the mentally handicapped PR folks. It has fallen WAY out of fashion to say, "That's gay" about something and/or "You're a f*g" (can't type it!) As well it SHOULD have. However, I am APPALLED at the number of kids AT MY CHURCH that tell each other how 'retarded' they are, and call each other 'retards'. I am VERY thankful to see a campaign to end such derogatory language and would invite you to join in. More info here.

And if you wonder what the big deal is -- read this story about an autistic child led his parents to come to know Christ. Wow.

Now, to lighten things up.

This explains A LOT!



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Language Lesson

'Across' is a word.

'Crossed' is a word.

'Acrossed' or 'acrosst' are not words (since it isn't actually a word, I don't know how to spell it).

That is all.

Help a Gal Out!

First, I have to say it: THE WIND!!! Enough! Although the wind did cancel soccer practice last night and then was kind enough to die down enough that all four of us could go on a little after- dinner walk. Awesome and MUCH needed in this break-neck week!

Remember my whole 'Reading to Write' plan? As life has sped up, reading has slowed down. Or, you know, stopped. My library stash no longer looks appealing, just daunting.

I need some help!

Lay 'em on me -- I need books that I need to read. HOWEVER -- my life is not currently in the place where a hard-to-follow book or one that requires much deep thinking or connectivity will survive. A short book is great. A funny book would be awesome. A touching book fabulous. A thinking book? Pass. My brain, it is used up.

Oh, truly, if it's a book your 5th grader is reading, I will probably love it. I have almost decided that is my genre.

What is a good book I need to read now?

Oh, and P.S. One other thing sitemeter tells me -- you people don't care for book reviews. It's okay. We'll do 'LOST' sometime!

How Nerdy Are You?

I think this means I'm only smarter than 12% of the people, as well. Tough quiz, I confess! It also says my "non-nerdy" score is not a guarantee of any level of coolness, either. Fine.

Credit Where Credit Is Due

First, I must pay homage, or give thanks, or SOMETHING.

Today's the day. No, I mean it is THE! DAY!

Troy has been working on THIS DAY for months. I don't know who will be the most glad when today is over. Besides some extra time of his wheels turning toward work at all hours of the day and night, this has been an UNBELIEVABLY busy week for the kids and me and juggling it without him hasn't been fun. So, Troy, who hasn't seen my blog in months, may it go ever-so-smoothly and, if nothing else, may it end. Please, Lord, let it end. Amen.

Which is why I've been thinking about the phrase, "If the devil can't make you bad, he'll make you busy." That's a quaint little saying with much truth to the end results of busy-ness. Being busy leads to not 'feeding' yourself spiritually with time in the Word and talking to the Lord which leads to a chink in your spiritual armor which leads to thinking you have your life all under control which leads to you falling smack on your face. I'm speaking from experience, people. Trust me on this.

The deal is, we're foisting the blame off on Satan when, unless you made some awful deal with him trying to get off the PTA board, he doesn't control your schedule and life. The only way 'the devil makes you busy' is if you allow it. Please hear me preaching at myself (while I answer an email about carpool AND the PTA board that I am on... hmmmm..).

So, I'm confessing and claiming responsibility. I have allowed my calendar to choke out my Savior. Yes, I write it that way and am horribly red-faced and repentant. But am I TRULY repentant and changing things so that my life looks different and my Savior is my Lord? Please hold me accountable.

Something I noticed while memorizing my 'Do Not Fear' verses -- almost ALL of them say (remind) "I am the Lord your God..." Not only does God remind us who HE is, He reminds us who He is TO US. Lord of our lives. Director of our days. Only when we STOP long enough to remind ourselves who He is can we truly live without fear. See how all of this works beautifully when we let it?

So in this busy season I will start by stopping. I will stop and claim Jesus as Lord over my life, but more importantly, over THIS DAY. This Day ordained for me. May your day be full of blessings!

How Did You Get Here?

TIRED today! Yesterday Ashley had a tennis tournament and did quite well, but those things can kind of drag on... That puts dinner late, then bed even later. I LOVE the opportunity to sit outside in the sun -- even if it is on those horrific bleachers -- but it really takes it out of you. (Ashley to mom: "Why are YOU tired??? All you did was sit and suntan!!")

If you'll notice there's a number over on the right under my Coffee Group button that's around 78,000. That (obviously) tells me how many visitors I've had on my blog since I installed that (which I have NO idea when that was) and when I log into my account I can learn some general information about those visitors.

Most interesting to me is the 'referrals' page -- where people where when they clicked over to my blog. Sometimes that lets me know that someone has included me in their blog roll and I didn't know it. It also lets me know that leaving a comment on Mike Cope's blog increases blog traffic as much, if not more than, participating in an online 'party'. And it's way less trouble, 'cause sometimes Mike is talking guacamole.

Some of you click over from readers. Yes, I have heard from those of you that hate me for changing my feed to 200 characters. There is a reason OTHER THAN trying to irritate you. No, it's not to lose you as a blog reader, either. Hope you'll click over, hope you'll read.

I do get some interesting 'Google' searches, too. One is about a specific cult that I won't mention. No cults here, folks. Keep going. Some people are just too lazy to bookmark my blog so I get several 'Sarah Stirman blog' searches. As long as it works, we're good!

So, while I am DROWNING in writing deadlines, let me know how you get to my blog. How did you show up here? I'm just glad you're here!

Better Than I Deserve

If you've ever caught Dave Ramsey online or on the radio, when people ask him how he's doing, his standard answer is, "Better than I deserve." I don't know if he really means it or if it has just become his 'schtick' now, but I think it's a great attitude to have in life. One that I could stand to adopt, I recently realized.

A few days ago someone important to me was unkind to me. I don't think I was the underlying problem, just received the backlash. I am certainly guilty of dragging fears and stresses around with me so that I can be sure to unload the full force of my life irritation on someone that I think will still love me when it's over. I guess that's what this was. But it still hurt my feelings.

So I told the Lord about it and, honestly, I wasn't ready to pray to be kind in return to this person. I told God about it and caught myself saying, "I deserve to be treated nicer than that!"

I think I heard some holy laughter.

Didn't His son deserve to be treated MUCH nicer than he was here on earth? Hasn't the Lord PROMISED me I would have trouble in this world?

Keep in mind, I wasn't being 'persecuted for my faith' -- I was being 'persecuted' (yes, I am using that term very, very broadly) just for being where I was. I just happened to receive the fall off of an irritating, fallen world we live in. And 'deserving to be treated better' -- that is SO the world talking!

No doubt, Beth reminded us in August, and scripture tells us all over -- we are co-heirs with the King of Kings! We have an inheritance! But to think "I deserve better" than the way I'm being treated. Well, I do, but I certainly can't righteously demand it.

Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
but made himself nothing,
taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
and became obedient to death—
even death on a cross!
Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
and gave him the name that is above every name,
that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.

Philippians 2:5-11

Good Things Out There

Gather the children 'round... They are REALLY going to want to hear this. Lysa always sums it up well.

I'm always proud of Roxanne, but this made me even prouder. While your children are gathered 'round, have them hug their teachers tomorrow.

Y'all, I am LOVING Picnik.com. It's free, free, FREE and has many of the same photo-editing features expensive softwares have. Of course, you can pay for premium and do more, but it's just so much FUN!!! I took this photo of Ashley and me:

and did this to it:
How fun is that?

And if this just don't beat all!!! "I would like to thank the Academy... or Theobloggers..." That's a pretty heavy-hitting line-up right there, and I'm honored and amazed to be included in the Chrisitan Blogger Award winners. Just another way the Lord continues to smile on me while closing a few doors on my foot.

This video isn't as funny as I generally do, but it's great info to have about running form to avoid injury such as knee, hip, and shin splints. It makes a LOT of sense to me -- but it will take me a LOT of work to break my horrible habits!

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Observing Life

What do you suppose Debra wears to the Dollar Place that is less dressed up than Wal-Mart? I'm afraid, very afraid.

Book Review: Water for Elephants

This is an EXCELLENTLY written book... that I didn't enjoy very much. Sadly.

Story is flash-backs: starts with a 93-year-old guy in an assisted living facility (he can't ever remember if he's 90 or 93...) and the circus is coming to town. Many of the residents are excited to go, and the excitement takes him back to the summer of 1931 when he worked on a circus.

As I said, excellently written in such a manner that I loved the lovable characters and hated the not-so-lovable. I didn't realize until I read the prologue that many of the situations included in the book are from Sara Gruen's research on the history of circus' that traveled by train. I think what I didn't enjoy was how true-to-life much of it was. From Amazon.com:

"Sara Gruen spares no detail in chronicling the squalid, filthy, brutish circumstances in which he finds himself. The animals are mangy, underfed or fed rotten food, and abused."

And it descends from there. All in all, I wouldn't say that it was a waste of time, but it was definitely a dark look at what likely really happened with a traveling circus.

I was nowhere NEAR New Hampshire!!

For the record, I don't THINK I have ever been to New Hampshire -- Scott Cody or David Mathews would have to let me know if we ventured through there on any mission trips from OCS. (I do vividly remember seeing David Jones sleep with his eyes open on that trip-- a very disturbing sight looking as if he were dead -- so I doubt he would remember)

Dad sent me an article a while back questioning my where-abouts when a plane flew into a Wal-Mart in New Hampshire. The pilot appeared to be severely hurt, so I pray that he has or will recover from this accident. The article mentions that he flew into the "eastern corner" of the Wal-Mart store. See? If Wal-Mart had simply chosen between the optometrist, bank, OR McDonald's instead of having all 3, the pilot just may have cleared the mammoth building!

Another Plea for Help (and Voting)!

So here's what you need to do:

Go here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-NO8R4c_8KE

Watch my mucho-talented friends. (They actually live in L.A. and cruise through BH, and are both in "The Biz". Trust me, people, they are big doin's and you haven't heard the last of them!)

Then leave a comment on youtube telling them how awesome the video is. Then, later, post this on YOUR blog and send everyone from YOUR blog to do the same. And maybe watch the video one more time, thereby increasing the number of 'views'!

What's in it for you? Well, you're helping them become foster parents, like the video shows.

Foster parents... of a Ford Fiesta. For six months. And if you vote for them, they will totally give you a ride in it. If you are on their 'adventure route'!

I am SO over...

Age is hard on a body, no doubt. But great on a psyche, I've decided. Things I have realized I don't have to do anymore:

• Cook a "special breakfast" on Sunday mornings. I know, you THINK I'm going to say that I do that every other day of the week so I gave it up on Sundays. Um, no. I do not cook breakfast unless I am making it for dinner. The "special breakfast" I'm referring to was usually something out of a box -- blueberry muffins, coffee cake, something we don't ordinarily have. I finally realized that if I throw a box of powdered sugar donuts on the table, I can still get dressed in a timely manner AND I am not tempted by those so I can walk away from them. And the kids are thrilled because it is the perfect combination of lard and sugar.
• A month-long regimen of tanning my legs with self-tanner before "the spring reveal." Mainly, there is no spring reveal anymore. I spend all year working out in a gym in shorts so it's no great stretch for me to just take those legs right on outside once the weather is warm enough. They are approximately this color at that point, too. And I'm okay with that.
• Invest time in friendships that are draining, shallow, or hurtful. I don't have enough time to invest in my quality friends as it is -- I'm sure not going to spend my valuable time deepening relationships that don't help me get through life.
  
• Acting as if I never have an "off-day." Again, life is too short. And, when you do have an off-day, it requires entirely too much energy to pile feigning cheeriness on top of the restraint to not shout at everyone you see.

What are you over?

It's a Par-Tay!!

Hey! If you came over from 5 Minutes for Mom's Ultimate Blog Party... WELCOME!

Come on in and make yourself at home. We do not go about putting on 'airs' here at The Cleft of the Rock. We're a what-you-see-is-what-you-get blog!

First, let me introduce you to my readers, 'cause they are the awesomest of awesome readers EV-UH!! Do you know that last week they nominated me for an award?? (Yes, I know it SOUNDS like I'm only talking about myself when I'm supposed to be introducing my readers) Isn't that the nicest ever? If you happen to wander over here on Monday the 23rd, you can still go vote for me. Wouldn't that be fun?

(faithful COTR readers -- voting ends today!!)

Because of that, it's a great time to come over here and meet me, since we've been doing a little reminiscing. If you go to the previous few posts, you'll see links to some of my readers' favorite posts. So come on in and browse around. While you do that, I'll tell you a little about myself:

I'm a mom of two -- over the top proud of both of them! One is my 7th grade sporty-girl, Ashley, and one is my 5th grade comedian/ random fact provider (stick around... we get one a week and they are definitely worth the price of admission). I'm also a wife to my best friend, Troy, a deer-hunting, motorcycle-riding, coat and tie-wearing (to work) kind of guy. Yes, he's full of contradictions.

I have a chocolate lab and a hedgehog, which also provide plenty of blog fodder, as well!

I am also a member of a ministry group, The Coffee Group. We travel and speak at ladies events, Judy gets us upgrades, Tammy takes the pictures, Donna keeps us organized, Denise makes us laugh, and I... just talk a lot, I think! It's a fun gig. Give us a buzz -- we'll come talk to you!

I do a little writing every now and then, too. A few weeks ago I shared my God-dream -- writing a book. My awesome readers were so great about it, that they are now sharing THEIR God-dream here. We would love to here from you about that, too!

Thanks for stopping by! I would love for you to leave a comment and let me know what you think... about anything!

Good Things Out There

I will let you know that this time last week I was in a BLACK mood. And while my life situation has changed... not one iota, and many of the 'irritants' of a week ago are still here, God has given me little droplets of blessing that I just needed. One is Coffee Group being featured on author Nicole Johnson's Fresh Brewed website!! That is a really happy thing for Coffee Group! We are really praying that God opens doors with this feature. Coffee Group is ready to continue our task of telling His story to women! Since we were sprucing up for company, we made some changes to our website. If you haven't checked it out lately, you need to!!

Another happy in my week was being nominated as one of the Best Blogs by a Female Blogger by the group at Theobloggers. If you still need to vote, go here. Voting ends tomorrow!

And, if you would still like to see a favorite post, here is:

Baked Potato? and

Memories of Poppa Max
Okay, the whole 'voting' theme means I CANNOT pass up an opportunity to repeat a video here. Sometimes I watch him just because... Absolute doodle bug. Enjoy my good friend, Truett.

Theobloggers voting ends tomorrow, though, so don't wait until November! :-)

If you would like to add your 'Good Thing' button to your blog, copy the code into an 'HTML' box on your sidebar:

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Observing Life

Does anyone else out there suspect that their gifted children purposefully do all the things you ask them to -- yet do it incorrectly -- with the underlying idea that we will eventually quit asking them to do things and just do it ourselves?

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Voting ends Monday for Theobloggers Christian Blog Awards. Vote here.

To check out some favorite posts:

How Great the Father's Love and

Y'all, Stickers Has Issues

Book Review: The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Society

After Bob's adamant review/ admonition that I MUST read this book ... well, I had to read it. It did NOT disappoint. Set just after World War II, it is a poignant look at how much war affects EVERYONE, even the landscape, yet still a precious story of hope, spunk, and re-building. Bob mentioned this, but I had forgotten -- it is letters back and forth, and such a precious look human spirit. Thumbs up. Go read.

Drumroll Please...!

First, thank you for suggesting some favorite blog posts! So fun!

If you would like to read two favorites here are links to:
Considering Valentine's Day and
The Beast vs. M.D. Anderson

If you still haven't voted in the Theobloggers Christian Blogger Awards, vote here. You can vote once per computer! :-)
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I am delayed in getting around to doing this because I WANTED to have a fun button to use for my guest bloggers, but it's not working. So, I shan't be all perfectionist-y, we shall trudge forward without a logo or button for my guest blogger for today.

A few weeks ago (that's already been two weeks, can you believe it?) I went out on a limb here and shared my God-dream with you, you awesome COTR readers, you. And you, you awesome COTR readers, you were your awesome selves. So sweet and encouraging and supportive. And I want us to share the love! So the next day I suggested that we share some other God-dreams out there -- no dream too big or too small. Let's hear 'em!

Of course, faithful Dad was one of the first to jump on the bandwagon. And since, if not for Dad, I wouldn't be around to have a God-dream, I find it only fitting for him to be my first guest-blogger to share his God-dream.

So, welcome Dad to COTR Guest-Blogger for the day:

So, tell The Cleft of the Rock readers a little about yourself: I'm a 64-year old Realtor, husband, father, grandfather, motorcycle enthusiast, sinner saved by Grace. I have been through some incredible health problems, my delivery from which assures me that God has big plans for me, and I pray every day for a glimpse of those plans.

How often do you stop by The Cleft of the Rock and what brings you by? At LEAST twice a day. I go there because of the content and quality of the writing, and of course because the blogger is my one and only daughter and I'm her biggest fan. But way beyond that, the frequent spiritual "lifts" I find there are truly valuable for a pilgrim like me that needs a thoughtful, and thought-provoking, "pick me up". Additionally, there are frequent links there for other writers I'm not aware of, and when Sarah finds them valuable, so do I.

Do you have a God-dream? Do you have more than one? Tell us about it(them): My main God-dream is to get a copy of "Hope in the Face of Cancer" into the hands of every newly-diagnosed patient I possibly can. God made entirely too many things come together for me to not know that's what I'm supposed to be doing - to use my cancer journey to assist others. Another God-dream is to be able to retire and devote myself to ministering full time to the members of my church. Due to the sour economy, that of course isn't coming together the way I expected it to, but God knows what he's doing so that it will come in its own time.

Are you currently doing anything toward this particular God-dream? I'm actively involved in getting the book out wherever and whenever I learn of someone who needs it. God has allowed me to be friends with the author, and she sells me the books at her cost.

What are some obstacles you see (or tell yourself) about your God-dream? I don't have any kind of network to be able to learn about who is newly diagnosed and therefore needs the book, so I have to rely on casual conversations. That naturally limits the amount of the blessing I can pass along.

What can other people do to encourage you in your God-dream? Just call me when a friend or relative is diagnosed with cancer. Or pass a copy along yourself. Pray for a cure, so that the author can cease selling the book!

Thanks, Dad, for sharing your God-dream with us. Your giving spirit is a blessing to us all.
If you would like to share your God-dream with us (Lisa Laree, you're up!) I'll email you an 'interview' for you to fill out!

Get Outta Town!

Y'all are just too sweet. My readers evidently nominated me for Best Blog by a Female Blogger over at the first annual Theobloggers Christian Blog Awards. How nice is that?

I was GOING to come over here and say "vote now! vote often!" (I THINK you can actually only vote once, though) but then I went and saw that two of the sweetest people EVER share the ballot with me!

Dee, who is blog buddies with Denise and Tammy, and our own
Red Hot Momma, Amanda are also nominated for the award. (Amanda leaves no stone unturned about a godly marriage on her blog. Love it -- she's also been a 'Good Thing..' over here!)

So, vote your conscience over there. Winners will be announced at Tulsa Workshop on March 28.
Hey, I have an idea...! In the comments, tell me about one (only choose one -- Roxanne!) of your favorite blog posts of mine. Okay, I'll make it easier on Roxanne -- I'll go ahead and put the recent Valentine's one, the baked potato one, and maybe my 'What I've learned' (birthday) one on the list. I'll include links to some of those from your list over the next few days if any newcomers are 'scoping me out' trying to decide before voting. If nothing else, it will be FUN! :-)

Poor Riley -- his random fact of the week got upstaged by that news, but it is definitely worth sharing still.

So at lunch on Sunday, family is discussing a PRECIOUS friend we have that I recently learned was a stewardess for her pre-children career.

Riley: "Stewardesses is the longest word you can type on a keyboard using only your left hand."

"May I PLEASE use that for a random fact for the week?"

"Absolutely. It's TRUE!"

And so it is. I shall type it one more time just to prove it: stewardesses. See? You try it!

For Your Blarney Stone

Do Not Fear

I am looking these up, largely with the help of this site.

They are really for a project for later, but I really needed them right now. I think I'm going to see how many of these I can recite from memory by next Sunday. I would love for you to join me.

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you." Deuteronomy 31:6

The LORD is my light and my salvation—whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life— of whom shall I be afraid? Psalm 27:1

For I am the LORD, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. Isaiah 41:13

For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." Romans 8:15

For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7

Good Things Out There

The most I'm going to do for St. Patrick's day this year is a) wear something green (too many years of working in an elementary school) and b)post a funny video (that I scheduled to post weeks ago and will be as surprised as you when I see it!) But if you would like to go all out, by all means... check out this post.

This is why I don't know Good Things Out There -- I've been re-doing this thing all week long... Still not quite finished, my apologies to Denise and Judy...

I can't believe my hubsters didn't write this song. My apologies now, but it will make you hungry for something you can't GET on Sunday! :-)

If you would like to add your 'Good Thing' button to your blog, copy the code into an 'HTML' box on your sidebar:

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Get. A. Life.

A quote from someone who was speaking directly to me (yes, she was serious), in conspiratorial tones:

"There just may have to be a coup."

What would require such drastic change of power?

PTA officers, of course.

Just don't get blood on your Gucci purse, sweety.

Book Review: No One You Know

Another FABULOSO book by Michelle Richmond, author of Year of Fog. Not quite as difficult to read -- but it still starts out with the most horrific event of the whole book: the murder of the main character's sister 20 prior to the setting of the book. But all in all, fabulous!!

I LOVE Michelle Richmond's writing -- I can completely get lost in it. And I think I would really love Michelle Richmond, too. There is a HILARIOUS part that is something of an inside joke to her faithful readers where the character happens across a book collection where the theme is 'fog'. Without naming her previous novel, she mentions a 'book about fog that had a kidnapping in it' and something about it being too drawn out or something. Can't really remember the entirety of it, but I loved the wink/ nod to me, a faithful reader!

I really think you would enjoy this book. Other than some PG-type discussion of the finding her sister's body, the rest of the book is clean as a whistle. Thumbs up.

I'm currently reading a recommendation from Bob. I am SO loving it. (No wait at our library! Woo-hoo) I'll tell you about it next week!

Encourage One Another

I really wanted to actually write my 'acknowledgement' page of my yet-to-be-published (or completely written, or entirely thought-through) book, but for now you will simply have to bear with me as I make a few thanks.

You never know what simple little word(s) will carry someone through for the day, perhaps even for a lifetime. There is one precious young mom (young -- she's about my age, but we met when we were young) in Temple where we used to live who, to this day, talks about how much she remembers one sentence of kindness uttered to her ... about 8 or 9 years ago. I have ZERO recollection of those words, but they must have carried her through when needed.

Too often, I recall others' words of hurt and devaluing. Sadly, too often I also remember my own words that sling hurt and belittle others.

This last week I have not been thinking of hurtful words. I have been thinking of building words.

I think of my friend Robin, tiny and soft-spoken, patting the table for emphasis (other people would slap the table, but Robin is genteel and therefore will pat the table as patting a precious baby) while her blue eyes bore a hole in my heart, "You are a writer. You are. You are a writer." (part of why this matters is Robin's background -- she knows writers). This was last summer at a wedding reception, but those 10 words have helped me put one foot in front of the other MANY times in the last 9 months.

I have thought of the precious souls --- all of you people!! --- wrote encouraging words as I tossed out my God-dream. You have NO idea how much each of those meant to me. Some I keep coming back to re-read. Lisa Laree, to remind me that my writing caused her to keep coming back -- well, that was an "apple of gold in a setting of silver".

I think of sweet Lynn B., who I (along with my husband) look WAY up to, and not just because he's real tall. He has consistently blessed me with kind words about my talents, and continues to do so and be a quiet but consistent cheerleader.

Then there's Angela, who not only offered encouraging words, but is helping me refine my skill. There's Christy, who offered to get me in touch with published-author-friend so I can hear the ins and outs. There are SO many of you, Craig, Aralee, Brooke, Kim, and others that pop in from facebook and write very encouraging words.

And there's the 'old-standby's-- those close to me that are sometimes overlooked because, in my heart, they HAVE to be nice to me! :-) My parents, my husband, my coffee group, my church family -- all consistent cheerleaders.

I can't name every name, I can't think of every time, but this I do know: I would never have tried this writing thing without those words. I would have quit long ago, and never looked back. Satan's words of doubt would have won if not for the constant chatter of those around me in sprinklings throughout my week: "You have a gift." "You did it again -- great work." "I love what you said."

So, if you have ever spoken one word of encouragement to ANYONE -- thank you. You never know, but you may have been the ONE voice to keep that person going for that one day.

"A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver." Proverbs 25:11

Interesting Fact for the Week

I've been VERY busy working on a project I will show you later in the week. I will give you a hint, though:

I have not painted, re-carpted, re-tiled, or installed anything. Nor have I mopped, dusted, washed, or de-cluttered anything. So, my house is a WRECK!

And I almost didn't get a blog in today. So, I have decided that Riley is going to help me blog one random fact a week.

For today, you get one that Riley delivered to us when I instructed him to go get a broom last week.

Riley returns and says:

"Did you know that the world's largest broom was broken down into 1,440 regular size brooms?"

I did not know that. Now I do, and so do you.

Marriage Monday

I really didn't intend to write about marriage quite so soon, but I went to a lovely wedding this weekend, and really appreciated something the minister performing the ceremony said.

Referring to an oft quoted scripture for weddings, Mark 10:7-9, he reminded us that God has joined that couple together. Just camp out and think on that for a moment. There may be times that you may think it was a mistake. There may be times you think YOU could have done better, and there are times you may KNOW s/he could have done better, but God joined the two of you together.

That wasn't his main point, though (to me). He said, "Therefore, if anyone is doing anything to threaten, or work against, this marriage, they are going against God."

Whoa.

Think on that for a moment. What if it's YOU that's doing something to work against your marriage -- like belittling your spouse, or constantly being dissatisfied with him/her, or being vocal to one and all about his/her shortcomings, or disrespecting him/ her to your children, or even longing for another that seems like a better pick.

Sometimes my marriage is fun and comforting, but sometimes my marriage is about learning a spiritual discipline by loving one of God's children.

May it never be me that is working against God in my marriage.

"Therefore, in the present case I advise you: Leave these men alone! Let them go! For if their purpose or activity is of human origin, it will fail. But if it is from God, you will not be able to stop these men; you will only find yourselves fighting against God." Acts 5:38,39

Good Things Out There

This week one of Riley's teachers used the phrase, "I'm sick as a dog, but having the time of my life." Riley had to point out to him, "That's from Andy Griffith!" A pop quiz ensued, Riley passed with flying colors, and I had to go look it up. That quote has made me laugh all week.

Sarah's Words to Live By

Don't break your arm patting yourself on the back for cleaning the kitchen until the crock pot has been washed...

Book Review: The Day After He Left for Iraq

I said in my post about what I've learned in life that a kid waving an American flag just makes me cry. Put that same kid at an airport to tell his/her daddy hello or good-bye as the soldier deals with war -- I can't even look. I'm so thankful for the soldiers that do a job I don't ever desire to do, and I'm especially thankful to the spouses left behind that try to maintain some sense of normalcy for their family.

The Day After He Left For Iraq is written by an army wife. At the time she writes about, her husband is deployed when her youngest is 4 weeks old, and her daughter is not quite two.

I'll be honest -- I didn't enjoy the book. I think simply because it was a raw look at how hard spouses work to make their lives seem normal. It was hard to hear about the difficulties of adjusting to life together again when he returned. It was just tough to read.

So Here's What I'm Thinkin' Now...

You people rock out loud. I don't go back and comment on the comments left on my blog -- the temptation would be to sit here all day and comment back and forth. If I don't live my life, what in heaven's name will I blog about? But I have been amazingly blessed by the encouragement and reaction to my public announcement of my God-dream. (To me, a God-dream is something that you believe God puts on your heart, and can only be accomplished with His might, power, skills, and energy -- not your own). I wished that each of you could know how it is to throw that out there and have folks cheer you on and ultimately say, "I believe in YOU -- keep it up!"

So here's what I'm thinkin'...

I have really been wanting to incorporate some guest bloggers into my yada yada line-up. Surely you weary of stories about hedgehogs and Sonic dashes. So I would love to have some of you 'guest blog' here and share your God-dreams with us. They could be crazy beyond crazy (they kind of have to be to know they actually are from God, you know?) or just a little nagging of "I really should..." Whatever it is, I would LOVE to hear from each of you if you would like to share your God-dream right on this very piece of blog-estate (as opposed to real-estate) and I would love for you to share it with my readers.

Here's how this will work. You are currently raising your hand and jumping in your computer chair as if you need Depends and shouting, "Ooooh! Pick me! Pick me! Let me share my God-dream!!" Oh, yes you are ... admit it. You may let me know you would like to share on here by commenting OR emailing me at: sstirman [at] gmail [dot] com (evidently writing out your email address like so prevents the crazies from finding you...)

Either way, be sure I have your email address. I will then email you a brief set of questions for you to answer as briefly or detailed as you choose. We'll agree on a 'guest blog' date for you to be posted here -- if you have a blog, you can send your readers here for the day! But having your own blog isn't necessary. Just a God-dream. There will, of course, be buttons and banners and logos -- my church is rubbing off on me! And I will share all of that with you, my guest blogger, to tell your friends you are here that day!

Then comes the good part -- your guest blog will be posted, and we will all clap and cheer you mightily, if for no other reason than because you stepped out on that limb to share your God-dream. And then we will all watch in wonder to see how God fulfills that dream through you.

So... who's with me? Who is ready to share their God-dream with Cleft of the Rock readers?

Livin' The Dream

Hello.

My name is Sarah.

I am a writer.

I'm writing a book.

That's hard for me to say all together. But I am throwing it out there, at the encouragement of a couple of wonderful, godly men.

This week I had the honor of having a lunch meeting (with about 20 other people -- all ACU students) with Michael Blanton, agent for Amy Grant and Michael W. Smith, and Steve Green, agent for Max Lucado and Phil Gulley. They both spoke a little about their respective industries, the paths they took to get where they currently are, then opened up the room to questions.

Let me say, above all, as they spoke, their faith was tangible and unmistakable. They know, through years of trying and succeeding, and plenty of years of trying and failing, that they and their business are wholly God's and He will fulfill His plans in their business.

I'll be honest -- I walked away from there initially discouraged. Mainly because what I heard (especially in response to my specific question) was what I've heard a million times before -- it's hard to break in, writers are a dime a dozen, yada, yada. But I also knew that I heard some golden wisdom from those two gentlemen.

One that was my favorite was from Michael Blanton: "God doesn't give us dreams to tease us. He will either fulfill that dream in us, or change the dream." Michael told the story of leaving ACU in 1973, determined that he was going to work just long enough to raise the capital to open a Christian ski resort in Colorado. When he was offered a job in Nashville, he initially refused since it was in the wrong direction from Colorado, and wasn't a job he really wanted. But Michael came to love what he was doing, how one thing led to another, and now, he says, his family is able to vacation in Colorado as much as he wants, but Michael is able to know that he has affected people's lives by his work.

They also talked a LOT about the fear of failure holding us back. Evidently Max Lucado has a book coming out the end of this year entitled, "Fearless". (Jana -- he totally stole your idea!) They mentioned that the fear of failure -- which is really just the fear of embarassment of not doing what you want/ hope to do -- keeps so many people from fulfilling their dreams.

My dream is to write a book. Maybe lots of books. And speak to groups. I LOVE to speak to groups. And I HATE telling you all of that. Because Satan whispers to me, "Writers are a dime a dozen. You'll never make it. Do you have any idea how many writers are out there? What do YOU have to say that makes a hill of beans of difference?"

And, truthfully, I can talk myself out of trying to do any of my dreams before I ever write the first word. But those men encouraged me to grab my dream, submit it to God, and work to make it happen. I was a LITTLE encouraged to hear that I am doing some things right: "You may want to think about starting a blog." (ya think?) "See if anybody shows up!" "Find out if people respond to your writing." "Sign up at Twitter." (check...)

So, I'm doing all I know to do. And it is all in His hands. And that's the absolute best place for my dreams to be.

"The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O LORD, endures forever— do not abandon the works of your hands." Psalm 138:8

I'm A Little Bit Country...

I'm not what anyone would consider a music connoisseur, by any stretch of the imagination. I like some stuff, I don't like other stuff, and I can't really tell you what I do and don't like in generalities. You're always welcome to look at my iTunes, but that does contain several songs that are detestable to me that my children seem to enjoy (and it also contains some songs I am so glad my children have introduced me to).

For whatever reason, I have decided the last few years that my music has seasons. I didn't really do it consciously, and I think there are some external factors at work, but summertime has become country music time. I think it's because for several years, the pool where we are members would be the only place I would hear country music. So last year, as the weather warmed up, I started getting in the mood to hear some country music.

Obviously, Christmas has its own music (that shall ONLY be played between Thanksgiving and Christmas and no other). So starting with New Years, I've been listening to some of Ashley's music -- pop-ish, I guess. I like most of it. Fun and groovy.

But yesterday, preacher Phil said something about 'meeting in the middle' and it made me think of this song. And I started thinking that maybe it's almost time to switch to country music stations. Is spring break too soon?

What about you? Does your music have seasons? Do certain times call for certain songs? Are you enjoying a current favorite?

Here's one of our favorites:

Marriage Monday

I recently ran into a friend that I have been missing at a different spot I usually encounter her. She mentioned that the other place wasn't really going well for her and she was going to take a break from it for several weeks. I didn't press, but eventually she confided in me that there was a man that she encountered the other place that was raising a red flag for herself.

She realized that one day she talked to that guy more than she did her own husband -- and much more animatedly and excitedly. She began to look forward to visiting with him, and knew something must be done. So she made a change -- that will also have her missing out on some wholesome friendship fun -- because she knew that relationship was heading a not-great direction.

I was and still am SO proud of my friend for the way she handled that situation. I would love to point out the things she did right to honor her marriage, her husband, and her God in that situation.

1. She recognized her heart. She recognized the intention of seeing this guy -- to get to know him, to feel like he was interested in her. My friend didn't elaborate on how things are in her marriage, and I have no reason to suspect there is any trouble. However, I do know her life looks like mine: husband involved in work and church, she's involved at church, kids in many different activities. None of that leaves a lot of time for gooey staring into each other's eyes and discussing hopes, dreams, and fears. To feel like someone is listening and really hears is attractive, exciting ... and dangerous.

2. She was willing to make radical change to get back on track where her brain should be. She's giving up some fun, she's changing the way she does some things in her day-to-day, and she's convicted of how unwise a relationship like that can be.

3. She was open with another Christian sister (that's me!) about the struggle it was for her. And, I certainly didn't judge-- haven't we all enjoyed a relationship that for at least 3 seconds seemed like it would be way more fun than our marriage was at the moment? Been there -- and proud of her so much! -- and can openly talk to her about it as well as pray with and for her about it.

Friends, no one sets out to have an affair. But you probably know as well as I do that affairs happen way too often... because Satan keeps them looking very attractive and reasonable. And like WE DESERVE to be happy/ feel better/ have someone treat us better. Whatever it is, I would encourage you to follow my friend's example and have all of your relationships to be completely above reproach. Denise says, "If I can't tell my husband who I've been talking to or what the conversation was about, I shouldn't be talking to that person." Amen and amen.

Again, just SO proud of my friend, who's still encouraging me to be a godly wife!

(For more on this topic: I wrote this post on Saturday, and came across this post on Sunday. Maybe God is trying to tell ME to guard my heart! hmmmm!)

Good Things Out There

I want to be Jana. She is tall and beautiful, with a gentle spirit, and a love for smart literature. She shared a beautiful poem here (and I'm not generally a poetry lover).

Won't the hubs be SO excited to get one of these for Father's Day (since it would have too many implications at my house, it would need a bottle of Prozac with it, as well).

I know I send you to Jana AND Kelly all the time, but here's another good reason to! Kelly was probably in 2nd grade when I moved to Temple ready to get married to Troy. In the 10 years we lived there I watched her turn into a physically beautiful young woman. After I had moved away and she had graduated from college, she came with her (amazing) mom to a retreat where Coffee Group spoke and we reconnected that way. I have come to learn what a spiritually beautiful woman she is, as well. Go be challenged by her beautiful spirit.

A sad thing for the rest of us, but as Katherine pointed out, now Paul Harvey knows the rest of the story. He had a MAJOR influence on me and my love of words and stories of life. Rest in peace.

If you need a graduation announcement this year, Tammy is lending her creative talents to producing those, too. I'm so glad I have friends that see the world in a totally different way than me! Let Tammy help you create a personal graduation announcement like this one.

Sometimes I feel this way about life in general: I just don't get it, and I seem to be getting run into all the time...



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Observing Life

I mentioned recently that I am enjoying my newly discovered permission to read all I want. Now I just need someone to give me permission to walk away from a book that I'm not enjoying. If you read enough books, you're going to get some stinkers eventually. I think I most appreciate the books that are horrible in the first two pages. Then I don't feel quite so committed.

Book Review: My Husband's Sweethearts

For whatever unintentional reason, I have read several books about death lately. Hmmmm....

But they all have been hopeful and sweet in their own way. And this was no exception. Main character Lucy is still furious at (and separated from) her cheating husband when he learns he is dying. Then, she's even madder that he's tying up her emotions. She goes home out of duty, but one night in a drunken fit, calls the names in his little black book saying, "Artie's dying. You need to come take your turn at his bedside."

The characters that take her up on it are precious and become everyone's sweethearts. There is much love and redemption in this fun little book. Yes, it's fun, even facing death. Again, I recommend!

Quote

(Got the quote from Katherine, though hers said, "Faith is the courage to dance to it today." Got the graphic here. I'm finding this quote attributed to 4 different sources, so let's go with 'Unknown')

Love It, But I Can't Spell It...

First, the responses from yesterday were awesome. You KNOW who just kind-of blog knows me, and who knows me personally. Christy, loved it, "(snort) as if I thought you were perfect...!" (That isn't a direct quote, but you get the idea).

I really wanted to include a photo of me how I USUALLY look --post workout, with some traces of yesterday's make-up, in a ponytail, but I never got around to taking the picture (another flaw: I'm a GREAT planner, a horrible follow-through-er). AND I COULD include a picture of the computer eqipment, Christmas wrapping paper, hand weights, and various and sundry items waiting to go to Goodwill that 'decorate' the floor of my bedroom, but I'm not quite THAT humble.... just imagine.

Today, I am clinging to this:

Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will be joyful in God my Savior. The Sovereign LORD is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to go on the heights. Habakkuk 3:17-19

(I'm practicing spelling 'Habakkuk' Yikes!)

Even If I Got it All Together, I Wouldn't Remember Where I Put It

Roxanne and I have been friends for a LONG time. A long time. We know each other. Mostly. I think I still say things that surprise Roxanne about me, and I tend to forget that my laugh-a-little-too-loud-too-long friend is a very capable, rockin' middle school teacher/ expert in teenage angst. But she had a great observation about me not too long ago.

We were catching up. I was mentioning that I had read a blog post about one person struggling the last few years and I was just floored. I told Roxanne that I know that from reading the blog, I have a limited vantage point, but from the blog and some other bits of information I have, this person's life seems to have completely fallen into place the last few years. Or, maybe, more accurately, fell into a place that I would like to be. I simply said it to observe, "You never know what's going on with people, you know?"

She pointed out that were someone to happen upon my blog, see my well-coiffed picture that Tammy took of me, and hear some of my day-to-day what-have-yous (she did point this out on a day that precious Michelle from Fresh Brewed Life put most of Coffee Group on a conference call to write us up for the website, and I got a new writing gig for the local paper), someone may think that I, too, have it all together. Well, bless. I simply do not....

Occasionally when someone realizes that I'm a certified teacher that interprets for the deaf at my church and teaches swimming lessons in the summer for extra dough, with an occasional article in a local magazine AND exercises on a regular basis, I will get, "Well, what DON'T you do...?"

The list is so very, very long.

I usually start with the most obvious (to me):
I don't keep a clean house. I LOVE having a clean house, but I get it that way about 4 times a year. In a good year. I turn a blind eye to clutter that would drive other people to drink.

I couldn't make it teaching. I guess if Troy got run over by a bus tomorrow and I needed more steady income than the sum total of the -$0- that I am currently earning as a writer, I would find a way. But, as it stands currently, I was unable to function in a job millions of men and women do every day quite successfully, and the job that I have a college degree in. That's a long therapy session right there.

I burn dinner, I serve it cold, I serve it how my family hates it, and I get grouchy when they don't like it. I frequently just walk away from the dirty kitchen (Troy usually takes care of it, but if he doesn't, I can hardly face it by the time I've already been in the kitchen an hour).

I do NOT make my family breakfast. I just can't. It's too early for me to function for people that have to be out of the house at a certain time... like all of us.

I'm horrible with our finances and, going on the unfortunate bus scenario for Troy again, I have NO idea what's what with our retirement (judging from the stock market, I'm sure I'm happier not knowing, but I don't know). I wasn't quite so bad with our finances when I was teaching and there was more of it to juggle, but I'm pretty bad at them.

And the list could continue forever.

I don't say this to say 'poor, pitiful me', though I confess to feeling that way at least once a week, if not once a day. I say it for several reasons. First, I say it because I have always felt it important to be a transparent person. I want people to see that we're all just people, and I, especially, am just people. In trying to not let my blog become a blog-o-griping, perhaps I do put too rosy a picture on things sometimes. Most importantly, I say it to remind everyone, myself included, that without the Lord working through me, I would accomplish nothing. Anything I do that may seem like a big deal is because He willed it and allowed it. 'Cause my way would surely screw it up.

So. I'm just a person, who does too much in too many places, (usually) trusting that God will use my cluttered life to do what He wills. Please don't think I've got it all together.

Balance? or Surrender?

I've been preachin' and preachin' -- on this blog and to anyone who would stop and listen -- that this life is all about finding balance. Home and work, family and job, family and ministry, church and ministry, yada, yada, the pull and tug of all of those is constant and unrelenting, so I have often thought and said that it is all about balance.

God has been leading me to understand that I am completely wrong.

This type of balance reminds me of a station the P.E. teachers have at the school where I substitute -- a small plank balanced on a PVC pipe about the diameter of a can of tennis balls. I've actually tried to do this, and have done it without even breaking any part of my body, which is an accomplishment in itself. I have pretty good balance, but to stay on that thing requires every bit of concentration and control I can give. AND I know when I am balanced and when I am not, which is rare when you're talking about the pull between your family and your ministry or your job.

I don't know what caused me to start thinking otherwise, but God very firmly said to me recently, "It's not about balance, it's about total surrender. To me." There is no balance in total surrender. Balance implies that I am completely in control -- the nudge of the Father or the breath of the Holy Spirit is likely to send my PVC pipe rolling and upset the delicate balance I have created in my world. Total surrender allows my day to be ordered by Him and the Holy Spirit, which takes a minute-by-minute surrender and conversation with Him. I don't know that I'm ready for that, I kind of like having the illusion that I am in control of my life and day. But my day goes REALLY wrong when God shows me that I never was in control.

What about my flat tire last week? Maybe I was supposed to come in contact with someone at the tire store. Did I? Nope, just read a book, trying to survive the irritation of MY plan not going how I wanted it. Did I miss what God had for me to do? I'll never know...

So today I shall surrender. My worries, my irritations, my own plans, my family, my ministry, my deadlines. All of it. (Seriously, it kind of makes my pulse race to think of letting it all go -- will it get done? What will happen?) Then I shall laugh to myself ever thinking I had any control of it anyway. And I will trust. None of that will be easy, but I will do that for today. And tomorrow I will get up and try again.

I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. Gal 2:20