What I've Learned

So, I had a birthday. It was relatively painless, though the number hurts just a little to say. In honor of spending ... some number of years on this planet, I compiled a list of things I've learned over the years -- one for each year, as a matter of fact. Some are about myself, some are about human nature, and some are just silly. Feel free to comment and tell me anything I've left off -- I'm sure I still have plenty to learn!

1. Any empty shopping cart at the back of the store is there for a reason. Don't get it. Satan lives in its wheels.

2. I actually am a morning person (I know what you're thinking Roxanne -- I'm not saying I'm HAPPY when I first wake up, I'm saying I'm PRODUCTIVE once I DO wake up).

3. "Time heals all wounds" = big fat lie.

4. Few people are actually mean and/or hateful just for grins -- most people just want to be heard and/or understood.

5. Men are generally unable to multi-task. (generality -- I'm sure there are exceptions)

6. I thought I 'got' unconditional love. Then I had children.

7. Laughter really is 'carbonated holiness' (Anne Lamott)

8. I have a deep need (is this me, or just human?) for trials and tragedies to have reason and purpose. Sometimes they just don't.

9. God can use unreasonable and purposeless trials and tragedies for His kingdom in mighty ways.

10. There are few quicker ways to make me cry other than showing me a child waving an American flag.

11. You never outgrow feeling like a total dork.

12. I'm stronger than I thought I was.

13. I'm more fearful than I thought I was.

14. Giving birth is actual hard work -- yes, there is a reason they call it labor.

15. Being a parent is way harder than labor.

16. Something will make me laugh about almost every situation. Usually at completely inappropriate times.

17. The human spirit has an amazing capacity for resiliency.

18. Few things are as peaceful, fulfilling, and just plain fun as simply 'being' with my family and enjoying laughing together. Doing this around the dinner table is my favorite time of day.

19. I have no tolerance for people who won't be authentic -- with me or anyone else.

20. The most offensive inauthentic people (to me) are those that don't have a clue they are because they never examine their own hearts.

21. I am WAY more introspective than your average person, which probably leads me to intolerance of inauthentic people who also aren't introspective.

22.I love words. Lots and lots -- a veritable plethora -- of words, of utterances. An affinity for vernacular. Love, love, love to use words.

23. The more words you use, the less impact they have. Bummer.

24. Dogs and children make me very happy.

25. I don't get people who don't enjoy dogs or children.

26. Forgive = scriptural; forgive and forget = human concoction to induce guilt. The Lord never tells us to forgive and forget, and ya ain't gonna. So just keep forgiving when you remember.

27. I thought being strong-willed and being a risk-taker were the same thing. Turns out I'm only one of those.

28. I HATE making phone calls, pretty much for any reason.

29. A person's own name has tremendous power to that person.

30. (another lesson from dad): People are generally willing to help you solve your problem. Give them the opportunity to help before attacking them because you have a problem.

31. "I'm sorry" goes a LONG way to diffusing a situation, even if you aren't responsible for the situation (see #4).

32. Drinking coffee makes me nervous and grouchy.

33. Drinking Diet Coke makes me nice.

34. I wield more power -- to build up, tear down, nurture or destroy -- as a wife and mother than I ever dreamed (especially if I work up a good set of tears). "With great power comes great responsibility."

35. Practice doesn't make perfect unless you're doing it correctly while you practice(I tell my kids "Perfect practice makes perfect" -- but I do realize how that makes me sound). Practicing something incorrectly will just make you very proficient at something WRONG.

36. A smile can generally disarm a grouchy person. It can even occasionally disarm my own grouchy face.

37. There really isn't any such thing as a 'spiritual giant': the people that we consider to be such are people who understand their own weaknesses (hey! maybe they're introspective!) and have truly come to see: "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 2 Corinthians 12:9

38. I am NEVER going to fully 'get it': my place on this earth, His love for me, the depth of my flesh nature, the height of His grace and forgiveness.

39. Nor will I EVER fully put to death my flesh nature while I'm still wearing my flesh. I can only plead ignorance and humanity, and let His grace be sufficient for me.