If you've ever caught Dave Ramsey online or on the radio, when people ask him how he's doing, his standard answer is, "Better than I deserve." I don't know if he really means it or if it has just become his 'schtick' now, but I think it's a great attitude to have in life. One that I could stand to adopt, I recently realized.
A few days ago someone important to me was unkind to me. I don't think I was the underlying problem, just received the backlash. I am certainly guilty of dragging fears and stresses around with me so that I can be sure to unload the full force of my life irritation on someone that I think will still love me when it's over. I guess that's what this was. But it still hurt my feelings.
So I told the Lord about it and, honestly, I wasn't ready to pray to be kind in return to this person. I told God about it and caught myself saying, "I deserve to be treated nicer than that!"
I think I heard some holy laughter.
Didn't His son deserve to be treated MUCH nicer than he was here on earth? Hasn't the Lord PROMISED me I would have trouble in this world?
Keep in mind, I wasn't being 'persecuted for my faith' -- I was being 'persecuted' (yes, I am using that term very, very broadly) just for being where I was. I just happened to receive the fall off of an irritating, fallen world we live in. And 'deserving to be treated better' -- that is SO the world talking!
No doubt, Beth reminded us in August, and scripture tells us all over -- we are co-heirs with the King of Kings! We have an inheritance! But to think "I deserve better" than the way I'm being treated. Well, I do, but I certainly can't righteously demand it.
Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
but made himself nothing,
taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
and became obedient to death—
even death on a cross!
Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
and gave him the name that is above every name,
that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.
Philippians 2:5-11
Showing posts with label Life 101. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life 101. Show all posts
Monday
Wednesday
It's Good to be Me
One of the life lessons I am still in the process of learning is that I'm not like anyone else.
I know! As an educator, I can tell you that I have just covered the first 6 weeks Social Studies curriculum for grades K-2. It's not "rocket surgery" (one of my favorite phrases from a previous job). There is only one me, only one set of my fingerprints and DNA. So why do I spend so much time trying to be other people?
I don't think it's a conscious thing, but I look to other people for ideas and inspiration for EVERYTHING: the way I dress, decorate my home, do any job, cook dinner, clean house, you name it. I always think someone else has a better/ smarter/ faster/ cheaper way of doing things. Occasionally they do! But I have come to realize as I am moving along in a different career I am looking to see how others have done it (which can be a good thing), and if I don't "fit" with how a different person has done it, I assume it can't work.
God finally laid this on my heart: "You are you. You are the you I have created you to be. No, you won't do things EXACTLY like that other person because you are not her. Nor are you that other one, or even the one over there. You are you, precious you. Go be you to My glory. I'll take care of the rest of it."
Again, not rocket surgery, but a simple reminder I needed today.
"Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine." Isaiah 43:1
I know! As an educator, I can tell you that I have just covered the first 6 weeks Social Studies curriculum for grades K-2. It's not "rocket surgery" (one of my favorite phrases from a previous job). There is only one me, only one set of my fingerprints and DNA. So why do I spend so much time trying to be other people?
I don't think it's a conscious thing, but I look to other people for ideas and inspiration for EVERYTHING: the way I dress, decorate my home, do any job, cook dinner, clean house, you name it. I always think someone else has a better/ smarter/ faster/ cheaper way of doing things. Occasionally they do! But I have come to realize as I am moving along in a different career I am looking to see how others have done it (which can be a good thing), and if I don't "fit" with how a different person has done it, I assume it can't work.
God finally laid this on my heart: "You are you. You are the you I have created you to be. No, you won't do things EXACTLY like that other person because you are not her. Nor are you that other one, or even the one over there. You are you, precious you. Go be you to My glory. I'll take care of the rest of it."
Again, not rocket surgery, but a simple reminder I needed today.
"Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine." Isaiah 43:1
What I've Learned
So, I had a birthday. It was relatively painless, though the number hurts just a little to say. In honor of spending ... some number of years on this planet, I compiled a list of things I've learned over the years -- one for each year, as a matter of fact. Some are about myself, some are about human nature, and some are just silly. Feel free to comment and tell me anything I've left off -- I'm sure I still have plenty to learn!
1. Any empty shopping cart at the back of the store is there for a reason. Don't get it. Satan lives in its wheels.
2. I actually am a morning person (I know what you're thinking Roxanne -- I'm not saying I'm HAPPY when I first wake up, I'm saying I'm PRODUCTIVE once I DO wake up).
3. "Time heals all wounds" = big fat lie.
4. Few people are actually mean and/or hateful just for grins -- most people just want to be heard and/or understood.
5. Men are generally unable to multi-task. (generality -- I'm sure there are exceptions)
6. I thought I 'got' unconditional love. Then I had children.
7. Laughter really is 'carbonated holiness' (Anne Lamott)
8. I have a deep need (is this me, or just human?) for trials and tragedies to have reason and purpose. Sometimes they just don't.
9. God can use unreasonable and purposeless trials and tragedies for His kingdom in mighty ways.
10. There are few quicker ways to make me cry other than showing me a child waving an American flag.
11. You never outgrow feeling like a total dork.
12. I'm stronger than I thought I was.
13. I'm more fearful than I thought I was.
14. Giving birth is actual hard work -- yes, there is a reason they call it labor.
15. Being a parent is way harder than labor.
16. Something will make me laugh about almost every situation. Usually at completely inappropriate times.
17. The human spirit has an amazing capacity for resiliency.
18. Few things are as peaceful, fulfilling, and just plain fun as simply 'being' with my family and enjoying laughing together. Doing this around the dinner table is my favorite time of day.
19. I have no tolerance for people who won't be authentic -- with me or anyone else.
20. The most offensive inauthentic people (to me) are those that don't have a clue they are because they never examine their own hearts.
21. I am WAY more introspective than your average person, which probably leads me to intolerance of inauthentic people who also aren't introspective.
22.I love words. Lots and lots -- a veritable plethora -- of words, of utterances. An affinity for vernacular. Love, love, love to use words.
23. The more words you use, the less impact they have. Bummer.
24. Dogs and children make me very happy.
25. I don't get people who don't enjoy dogs or children.
26. Forgive = scriptural; forgive and forget = human concoction to induce guilt. The Lord never tells us to forgive and forget, and ya ain't gonna. So just keep forgiving when you remember.
27. I thought being strong-willed and being a risk-taker were the same thing. Turns out I'm only one of those.
28. I HATE making phone calls, pretty much for any reason.
29. A person's own name has tremendous power to that person.
30. (another lesson from dad): People are generally willing to help you solve your problem. Give them the opportunity to help before attacking them because you have a problem.
31. "I'm sorry" goes a LONG way to diffusing a situation, even if you aren't responsible for the situation (see #4).
32. Drinking coffee makes me nervous and grouchy.
33. Drinking Diet Coke makes me nice.
34. I wield more power -- to build up, tear down, nurture or destroy -- as a wife and mother than I ever dreamed (especially if I work up a good set of tears). "With great power comes great responsibility."
35. Practice doesn't make perfect unless you're doing it correctly while you practice(I tell my kids "Perfect practice makes perfect" -- but I do realize how that makes me sound). Practicing something incorrectly will just make you very proficient at something WRONG.
36. A smile can generally disarm a grouchy person. It can even occasionally disarm my own grouchy face.
37. There really isn't any such thing as a 'spiritual giant': the people that we consider to be such are people who understand their own weaknesses (hey! maybe they're introspective!) and have truly come to see: "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 2 Corinthians 12:9
38. I am NEVER going to fully 'get it': my place on this earth, His love for me, the depth of my flesh nature, the height of His grace and forgiveness.
39. Nor will I EVER fully put to death my flesh nature while I'm still wearing my flesh. I can only plead ignorance and humanity, and let His grace be sufficient for me.
1. Any empty shopping cart at the back of the store is there for a reason. Don't get it. Satan lives in its wheels.
2. I actually am a morning person (I know what you're thinking Roxanne -- I'm not saying I'm HAPPY when I first wake up, I'm saying I'm PRODUCTIVE once I DO wake up).
3. "Time heals all wounds" = big fat lie.
4. Few people are actually mean and/or hateful just for grins -- most people just want to be heard and/or understood.
5. Men are generally unable to multi-task. (generality -- I'm sure there are exceptions)
6. I thought I 'got' unconditional love. Then I had children.
7. Laughter really is 'carbonated holiness' (Anne Lamott)
8. I have a deep need (is this me, or just human?) for trials and tragedies to have reason and purpose. Sometimes they just don't.
9. God can use unreasonable and purposeless trials and tragedies for His kingdom in mighty ways.
10. There are few quicker ways to make me cry other than showing me a child waving an American flag.
11. You never outgrow feeling like a total dork.
12. I'm stronger than I thought I was.
13. I'm more fearful than I thought I was.
14. Giving birth is actual hard work -- yes, there is a reason they call it labor.
15. Being a parent is way harder than labor.
16. Something will make me laugh about almost every situation. Usually at completely inappropriate times.
17. The human spirit has an amazing capacity for resiliency.
18. Few things are as peaceful, fulfilling, and just plain fun as simply 'being' with my family and enjoying laughing together. Doing this around the dinner table is my favorite time of day.
19. I have no tolerance for people who won't be authentic -- with me or anyone else.
20. The most offensive inauthentic people (to me) are those that don't have a clue they are because they never examine their own hearts.
21. I am WAY more introspective than your average person, which probably leads me to intolerance of inauthentic people who also aren't introspective.
22.I love words. Lots and lots -- a veritable plethora -- of words, of utterances. An affinity for vernacular. Love, love, love to use words.
23. The more words you use, the less impact they have. Bummer.
24. Dogs and children make me very happy.
25. I don't get people who don't enjoy dogs or children.
26. Forgive = scriptural; forgive and forget = human concoction to induce guilt. The Lord never tells us to forgive and forget, and ya ain't gonna. So just keep forgiving when you remember.
27. I thought being strong-willed and being a risk-taker were the same thing. Turns out I'm only one of those.
28. I HATE making phone calls, pretty much for any reason.
29. A person's own name has tremendous power to that person.
30. (another lesson from dad): People are generally willing to help you solve your problem. Give them the opportunity to help before attacking them because you have a problem.
31. "I'm sorry" goes a LONG way to diffusing a situation, even if you aren't responsible for the situation (see #4).
32. Drinking coffee makes me nervous and grouchy.
33. Drinking Diet Coke makes me nice.
34. I wield more power -- to build up, tear down, nurture or destroy -- as a wife and mother than I ever dreamed (especially if I work up a good set of tears). "With great power comes great responsibility."
35. Practice doesn't make perfect unless you're doing it correctly while you practice(I tell my kids "Perfect practice makes perfect" -- but I do realize how that makes me sound). Practicing something incorrectly will just make you very proficient at something WRONG.
36. A smile can generally disarm a grouchy person. It can even occasionally disarm my own grouchy face.
37. There really isn't any such thing as a 'spiritual giant': the people that we consider to be such are people who understand their own weaknesses (hey! maybe they're introspective!) and have truly come to see: "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 2 Corinthians 12:9
38. I am NEVER going to fully 'get it': my place on this earth, His love for me, the depth of my flesh nature, the height of His grace and forgiveness.
39. Nor will I EVER fully put to death my flesh nature while I'm still wearing my flesh. I can only plead ignorance and humanity, and let His grace be sufficient for me.
Monday
Life 101
I still remember sliding in the yellow plastic booth at The Pickle Barrel -- a local deli --when it was across the street from the church building. We placed our order and after the waitress told us it would be right out, my dad replied, "Thank you, Karen." Considering my father knows a large portion of Ouachita Parish, I asked, "How do you know her?" "I don't," he replied, "I read her nametag, but I know the sweetest sound in any language is the sound of your own name." The smile Karen produced upon being called by name was a fairly good indicator that he was right.
What a small thing -- to notice a name tag and speak as if the person wearing it is, in fact, a person. But what a huge thing to the person. Maybe we need name tags at the gym. It occurred to me last week -- the impetus for this blog in fact -- that in the two-three years I have been attending the same early morning exercise class at my gym, the instructor has never bothered to learn my name. I'm not bitter. Really, I'm not. :-) But of the 6-8 of us that have been attending faithfully in that time, I'm fairly sure I am the only one that the instructor doesn't call by name, either in greeting or farewell. "Great work, Linda!" "Glad you were here, Mike." "See you next time, Sharon." I get bupkus.
Now, since I'm not 14, I really truly have no issues about this. However, in the winters, when my bed is really warm, and the floor is really not, it's just easier to stay in bed when I know no one will be calling my name or missing me there.
Vann recently mentioned that a waitress where he was dining mentioned, "I'm surprised you remembered my name." It's such a little thing, but so precious.
Not long ago Phil spoke of the story of the man consumed by an evil spirit that Jesus healed. (Mark 5:1-20) Phil pointed out that Jesus first asked, "What is your name?" of a man completely given over to evil. With those words, Jesus reminded us that even people completely consumed by evil still have a name, still have value. And how simple is that sentence to inquire, "What is your name?"
Look for opportunities to use the name of someone who may not expect that you know it. And, if you don't know it, be like Jesus, and simply ask, "What is your name?" Then use it.
What a small thing -- to notice a name tag and speak as if the person wearing it is, in fact, a person. But what a huge thing to the person. Maybe we need name tags at the gym. It occurred to me last week -- the impetus for this blog in fact -- that in the two-three years I have been attending the same early morning exercise class at my gym, the instructor has never bothered to learn my name. I'm not bitter. Really, I'm not. :-) But of the 6-8 of us that have been attending faithfully in that time, I'm fairly sure I am the only one that the instructor doesn't call by name, either in greeting or farewell. "Great work, Linda!" "Glad you were here, Mike." "See you next time, Sharon." I get bupkus.
Now, since I'm not 14, I really truly have no issues about this. However, in the winters, when my bed is really warm, and the floor is really not, it's just easier to stay in bed when I know no one will be calling my name or missing me there.
Vann recently mentioned that a waitress where he was dining mentioned, "I'm surprised you remembered my name." It's such a little thing, but so precious.
Not long ago Phil spoke of the story of the man consumed by an evil spirit that Jesus healed. (Mark 5:1-20) Phil pointed out that Jesus first asked, "What is your name?" of a man completely given over to evil. With those words, Jesus reminded us that even people completely consumed by evil still have a name, still have value. And how simple is that sentence to inquire, "What is your name?"
Look for opportunities to use the name of someone who may not expect that you know it. And, if you don't know it, be like Jesus, and simply ask, "What is your name?" Then use it.
Life 101
The calendar pages flip, the birthday candles add up, the grays multiply and gravity takes its toll. Life can wear a person out, but if you're smart, you learn a few things along the way.
Some things I've learned are fairly inconseqential, yet valuable. For instance, you're in the grocery store for a few things. You pick up one thing. Then another. You get to the back of the store and remember the ingredients for the cupcakes you're supposed to bake, or the 20 lb. box of detergent you need, whatever. You realize you REALLY should have grabbed a cart and sigh at the prospect of returning to the front of the store to get one. Then, lo and behold! A cart! Seemingly sent from heaven, empty and unattended, as if the angel Gabriel provided you ease of shopping. Listen up: DO NOT GET THAT CART! Do you hear me? That cart is from Satan and was abandoned for a reason! It will challenge your religion as well as your vow to clean up your language. It is worth the trip to the front of the store! Simply one thing I have learned on my journey.
Another thing just continues to bubble in front of me, and I can't let it go. I've heard it a minimum of a million six times. It's scripture so I would never have challenged it, but I just have seen it lived out too many times to ignore it:
As Coffee Group travels telling our stories, I never fail to hear something new in our stories. But one thing I consistently think when Tammy tells her story of years of wandering, seeking peace and comfort in places other than God's arms, is how God wouldn't let her stay there. He sought her out, hunted her down, and wouldn't let her go. I thought the same thing reading "Same Kind of Different As Me". Both of the authors mention shallow (or non-existent) faith in their lives, but the story that unfolds is, to me, evidence that God wouldn't rest until they had returned.
The recent attention that Josh Hamilton has garnered is yet another illustration of that (you MUST click on that link -- AMAZING). Truly, I would yet to hear about him if not for Kelly, the cutest baseball fan I know, but his story so clearly illustrates God's tenacious seeking of His wandering children. And, just last night, I was having a phone conversation with my own brother, who had what I call "his prodigal years". We were talking about how heart-breaking it was for the rest of us in my family to see him like that. I mentioned that I believe with all of my heart (and I still do) that it was the fervent, pleading prayers of my mother that brought that child of God back into the fold. Even as I said it, though, I continued to think -- mom's prayers, and God's faithfulness to His children. God wouldn't let my brother go. He refused to surrender one of His children to the darkness. And, by my brother's own account -- it isn't like he was, at the time, very valuable to the Kingdom.
But, oh, the value of a rescued soul. The hearts they can touch. If for no other reason, than to proclaim, "If He wanted me, the way I was, then He probably wants you, too." God gives us the freedom to try, but you cannot sin beyond His love and forgiveness. Nor can you run far enough from His loving embrace. The story of the prodigal is so glorious. The moment the son could be seen returning to his Father's home, "But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him." (Luke 15:20)
Obviously, way better than learning how to avoid a rotten shopping cart, I am convinced that the Lord seeks out His children relentlessly. And when He sees them over the top of hill, He gathers His robes around His feet and runs to meet that child with loving arms. Glory.
Some things I've learned are fairly inconseqential, yet valuable. For instance, you're in the grocery store for a few things. You pick up one thing. Then another. You get to the back of the store and remember the ingredients for the cupcakes you're supposed to bake, or the 20 lb. box of detergent you need, whatever. You realize you REALLY should have grabbed a cart and sigh at the prospect of returning to the front of the store to get one. Then, lo and behold! A cart! Seemingly sent from heaven, empty and unattended, as if the angel Gabriel provided you ease of shopping. Listen up: DO NOT GET THAT CART! Do you hear me? That cart is from Satan and was abandoned for a reason! It will challenge your religion as well as your vow to clean up your language. It is worth the trip to the front of the store! Simply one thing I have learned on my journey.
Another thing just continues to bubble in front of me, and I can't let it go. I've heard it a minimum of a million six times. It's scripture so I would never have challenged it, but I just have seen it lived out too many times to ignore it:
"What do you think? If a man owns a hundred sheep, and one of them wanders
away, will he not leave the ninety-nine on the hills and go to look for the one
that wandered off? And if he finds it, I tell you the truth, he is happier about
that one sheep than about the ninety-nine that did not wander off. In the same
way your Father in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should be
lost." Matthew 18:12-14
As Coffee Group travels telling our stories, I never fail to hear something new in our stories. But one thing I consistently think when Tammy tells her story of years of wandering, seeking peace and comfort in places other than God's arms, is how God wouldn't let her stay there. He sought her out, hunted her down, and wouldn't let her go. I thought the same thing reading "Same Kind of Different As Me". Both of the authors mention shallow (or non-existent) faith in their lives, but the story that unfolds is, to me, evidence that God wouldn't rest until they had returned.
The recent attention that Josh Hamilton has garnered is yet another illustration of that (you MUST click on that link -- AMAZING). Truly, I would yet to hear about him if not for Kelly, the cutest baseball fan I know, but his story so clearly illustrates God's tenacious seeking of His wandering children. And, just last night, I was having a phone conversation with my own brother, who had what I call "his prodigal years". We were talking about how heart-breaking it was for the rest of us in my family to see him like that. I mentioned that I believe with all of my heart (and I still do) that it was the fervent, pleading prayers of my mother that brought that child of God back into the fold. Even as I said it, though, I continued to think -- mom's prayers, and God's faithfulness to His children. God wouldn't let my brother go. He refused to surrender one of His children to the darkness. And, by my brother's own account -- it isn't like he was, at the time, very valuable to the Kingdom.
But, oh, the value of a rescued soul. The hearts they can touch. If for no other reason, than to proclaim, "If He wanted me, the way I was, then He probably wants you, too." God gives us the freedom to try, but you cannot sin beyond His love and forgiveness. Nor can you run far enough from His loving embrace. The story of the prodigal is so glorious. The moment the son could be seen returning to his Father's home, "But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him." (Luke 15:20)
Obviously, way better than learning how to avoid a rotten shopping cart, I am convinced that the Lord seeks out His children relentlessly. And when He sees them over the top of hill, He gathers His robes around His feet and runs to meet that child with loving arms. Glory.
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