Years ago I wrote this for Father's Day. Today is my first Father's Day without my Max. Wish I could hear his voice one last time. Wondering when the last time I heard his voice actually was -- maybe it was this day. I hope so -- because I know he told me he loved me.
This morning in my Sunday school class one of the 4th graders wanted to pray for our dads to have a happy Father's Day. Then one student reminded me -- truly, I just skipped it in my brain -- that her daddy is already in heaven with Jesus. He has been for 7 years (I think, 7? 8?) So we prayed for daddies on earth, and daddies in heaven, and uncles and grandpas who love us when our daddies are in heaven. My interpreter friend who lost a husband last year said she would simply be unable to interpret today. I wasn't able to stay around after church long enough to hug her neck. And the Dobbs family counts their blessings of children and grandchildren on Father's Day, when John Robert won't be here to wish John a happy Father's Day.
Even when things are going well in MY house, it seems that every year there is more pain than celebration around Mother's Day and Father's Day. It can be so hard. Father's Day is so much more special to me than Mother's Day -- because I like to celebrate my Perfect Father, as well. Without Him, the hurt of this day and this world would be forever. Without Him, the blessings of this world would be shallow and temporal.
May you find His blessings in a Happy Father's Day, or a just-surviving Father's Day!
4 comments:
Right before school was out, Tony and I were discussing our beginning of summer calendar. . .not a cloud in my emotional sky. . .then I said, "Well, on Father's Day. . ." and a storm erupted. Didn't even see it coming. Father's Day in Heaven, however, is probably pretty good.
it's been 26 years and mother's day still hurts.
I think of where my mom would be if she was here on earth and how wonderful our relationship would be.
I try to continue to keep my relationship with my daughter close... because I know it's a good memorial to what me and my mom would have.
I thought I had done really well getting through my first father's day without my dad when I sat down and read this post, and went into the links you included. Boy, did that open the gates.
We survived ... with tears ... but with God's grace. Thanks.
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