You're Stronger Than You Think You Are

I've mentioned running on occasion. If someone says that I'm a runner I make them do air quotes around the word and call me a "runner." It doesn't come naturally to me. I didn't start really running until my 30's. I am slow. My running plans never go how I want because there are few plans out there for 40-something beginners that are turtle-slow.

My last 5k. I finished before they cleared the course. 

Photo courtesy Celebrated Images

If you are a Facebook friend or follow me on Twitter you know that I run in the morning, sometimes horrifically early. I'm not necessarily a morning person, but that is when the running must be done if it is to get done.

My legs don't work well and my brain doesn't work well at still-too-dark hours of the morning. Thankfully, my brain only has to figure out to put one foot in front of the other and stay out of traffic. That much I can usually manage.

My legs take a while to get going on these runs. I give myself a few minutes to warm up and then begin to wonder why I didn't stay in bed.

Lately, though, a sentence has been echoing in my head. A sentence that has propelled me further and faster (relatively speaking, of course) than any training program or motivational thought.

Less than ten words spoken to me over a year ago keep my legs in motion.

When we first moved here (almost 2 years ago) God almost immediately brought me a running partner knowing that I needed the running to keep me sane and the partner to keep me faithful.

She is a much stronger runner than I am but is eternally patient and helped me get on track. I was discussing some training I wanted to do or something I hoped to accomplish but bemoaning my lack of ability.

And there it was:

"You're a stronger runner than you think you are."

I don't know if she was just filling the air -- though she isn't one to say something she doesn't mean -- or if she really believed that.

It doesn't matter.

What matters is that I believed it. Okay -- I didn't believe it at first. But I considered it as a possibility. So I somewhat tested it. Maybe I can run a little longer before a walk break. Maybe this isn't as fast as these legs will go.

My running partner has moved away. I am left to train on my own. It's been a tumultuous winter of illness and injury for me. But out the door I go, starting over again and again. My legs complain. My lungs burn. But I hear it.

"You're a stronger runner than you think you are."

So I keep at it. And run just a little more and a little more.

Turns out -- I really am a stronger runner than I thought I was.

It took just a few words of encouragement from someone for me to find that out. Someone else had to believe in me before I could believe in myself.

The power of encouragement. You are probably stronger -- physically and emotionally -- than you think you are. And you probably need to tell someone close to you that they are, too.

Great video about the power of one person believing in another:

State of the Sarah and "I Believe in You!"

Thank you to all of you for your affirmations -- or commiserating, perhaps -- as I wallowed in the pit of identity crisis last week. And am there still, to some degree, I suppose.

Some things I have considered in the last week -- especially in light of the comments from that post:


*Having a job would not make my life/ boundaries any more defined. 
As a matter of fact, it would probably make them less so. I hereby confess to a "the grass is greener when you get a paycheck" mindset.


*I have discounted the impact a move makes on our life boundaries.
Something made me remember that 10 years ago when we moved to Abilene, I polled about 50-60 people that I knew from Central Texas. I just asked for them to send me three words that described me. At the time, I thought it was, "My baby is starting kinder, I can do whatever I want, I just moved, whatever shall I do" angst. But my hindsight 20/20 tells me here that the move had a big impact on that disconnected feeling.


So this week amongst the cast trips (oh, stars, if you aren't a FB friend -- nothing major: football, 13 year old boy, wrist, ER, splint, got wet, another splint, finally a cast... just bless) and other life and goings on, God blessed me immensely through the words of a friend.


This friend is barely keeping her own head above water with her life/ job/ family, so I don't think she stops by the ol' blog very often. I doubt she had seen the post from last week. Even if she had, blessing nonetheless.

We had an email exchange about some business-y-type stuff. I asked her how her very busy life was going, she filled me in on some stuff, and concluded by saying: 


"I believe in you and the call on your life."

Are those some awesome words?

"I believe in you."

I hope you have someone in your life that speaks blessings and affirmations over you.
I hope you have someone in your life that believes in the call on your life -- and helps you discover then cultivate yours.

 "A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver."Proverbs 25:11

Do you have someone in your life that has recently affirmed and/or blessed you? Have you recently blessed and/or affirmed the call on someone else's life? Would love to hear about it.
 

Marriage Monday: Be the Cheerleader!!

Yes, I know it's not Monday anymore. Po-tay-to, po-tah-to. I'm still going to talk about marriage, so let's just let me call it what I will, shall we?

I suspect I may start sounding like a broken record in this regard, but it occurs to me that I need the reminder still. Weeks ago I mentioned using encouraging words with your spouse or, at the very least, biting your tongue about things that don't matter.

No. No skirt or gymnastics required.

Today, I want to encourage you to consider yourself your spouse's cheerleader.

Not that kind of cheerleader.

The cheerleader that speaks well of him/ her even when s/he isn't around.  The kind of person that remembers why you got married in the first place -- and tells other people all the great things about him/ her.

Be the person that speaks well of your spouse to your children so that your children honor, love, and respect your spouse as well.

Be the person that tells other people how great your spouse is at... what? My spouse is great at his job. He's a perfect fit for it. Because of that, he got asked to help with a ministry at church that was an extension of what he does. I let other people know how good he would be at that.

Part of what makes him good is that he cares about the people he's working with and for, and NEVER gives less than 100% to any job that he does. He's a pretty amazing guy. You can see how those qualities bless us here at the house, too. Obviously, I could go on.

This Marriage Monday / Tuesday comes with a homework assignment: compliment your spouse 3 times a day for the next week. If you compliment him/ her TO someone else, that counts! Let's check back in next week and see how we did.

Brag Time! Tell me now: my spouse is great at/ or because...? Why?

Don't Quit

originally published at Word for Today

I am a wanna-be runner. I will train and run and begin to almost feel like a runner, and life, illness, or an injury will set me back. But for whatever reason, I am determined. I will not release the thought of being a runner, so it’s back on the track... so to speak. At least it’s back to the training plan.

Lately it has been a little easier to get back to my plan as I have a very patient running partner. She is consistently ready for me to get back to it, yet understands my need for a break when illness or injury call for it. She won’t let me get away with “I’m just not feeling it today...” because she knows what my ultimate goal is: to be a runner, with maybe a distance race completed eventually. 

Hebrews calls me to the same single-minded dedication to the hope I have: “Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.” (Hebrews 10:19-24)

Yes, He who promised is faithful, but there are days that I might lose my grip on my hope. These verses give me two remedies for that. First, “draw near to God with a sincere heart.” That is truly some of the best news in the New Testament -- that we don’t have to take our petitions to God through a priest. These scriptures remind us that Christ gave us the confidence to enter the Most Holy Place, cleansed by his very blood. Nothing can prevent us from doing that on a daily, even hourly, basis.

Sometimes I just don’t have it in me to do that, though. When the unemployment seems to drag on longer than I ever dreamed, or the news from the doctor wasn’t what I hoped it would be, when family news is disappointing or hurtful, sometimes my heart is too broken, too fragile, or too wounded to approach the throne of grace.

That’s when I look to my running partner... or those that “spur me on toward love and good deeds.” God placed us here to be in community so that we may do just that. When I have the strength and energy, it is my time to spur others on toward love and good deeds. Other times, I let those that run this race with me encourage me to simply put one foot in front of the other, to approach the throne of grace.

Let’s run victoriously today.

Marriage Monday: Encouraging Words

My thoughts on marriage today are prompted by Trey's post making the amazing claim: "How to Drop the Divorce Rate to 7% in Your Marriage."

Well, I was all about that. I have mentioned about a time or 50 that Troy and I have stared divorce in the face and by the grace of God and prayers of others we came out on the other side. And we are wiser and gentler with each other for it (did you know that most marriages -- like 80%-ish -- that are unhappy report that 5 years later are happier than ever? Because they have found the value in sticking it out).

However, that doesn't mean that we are immune to common pitfalls in marriage. Hyper-aware that they are taking place, maybe, but they still crop up from time-to-time.

Take now, for instance. Let's push aside the fact that the kids and I have only lived in this area for 3 months, so aren't super familiar with neighbors and friends, and certainly don't have a carpool support system. Fall has defaulted to being our crazy-busy season since that includes activities of both of our kids. Marching band practice has one going until late day while football practice gets one up in the wee hours of the morning, football games (for both) are on 2 nights a week, then the schools want us to meet the teacher, party with the band, and do all kinds of other things that take up evenings and time and gasoline.

It is a fun season of life watching our kids do what God has gifted them to do, but it does coincide with a busy season at Troy's work, when they also happen to be short-handed. Today is a fairly typical 13-hour day for him to launch a busy week that concludes with an out-of-town business trip over the weekend. It's our season of life and where God has us now.

So communication is brief. Emails and texts fly about schedules, finances, errands, and home maintenance. By the end of the day, it's "I'm starving," "What's for dinner," and "Who's turn is it to clean up?" That's about all we have left.

When Trey's blog post mentioned to compliment our spouse 5 times for every negative thing we say, I confess I was at a loss.
"Your car looks so shiny as you drive away in the mornings..."
"You spell everything right in your texts to tell me how late you're going to be..."

Once I started paying attention -- that if I wasn't going to compliment, I had to quit being negative, for starters -- I found places to compliment. When you've been married ... as long as we have (a number that we actually disagree on -- we have no idea how long it will be this November ... but I'm pretty sure I'm right... :-) you forget that someone still likes to hear compliments on their appearance.

But of course I lOVE to get compliments -- and Troy is good at that. I'll have to compliment him on  his complimenting me.

If it's really that easy, will you do it? Compliment your spouse 5 times for every negative thing you say? I found myself biting my tongue about ridiculous criticisms (where the soy sauce goes in the pantry, for example) just so I wouldn't have to dream up compliments about someone I'm barely spending any time around currently. Yes, I am being bare bones honest right now.

I married an amazing, godly man and it has been good for me to remember all the reasons why! What about you?

Dear Running Dude

(now that I am on my Facebook fast, the blog will get my drive-by thoughts again. Won't that be fun?)

Dear Runner Dude,

You totally kept me going today. I had a 5 mile run today (that I am still walk/running). Want to know something HILARIOUS -- so I am at about mile 3.9, running with my iPhone for my music and Nike+ training thing, and I checked my training plan on SmartCoach to see the pace I should be going my 5 miles. Because I am a turtle and today I totally blew that turtle business out of the water... for the first 3.5 miles. Then the turtles passed me and laughed and gathered their friends around to point and laugh.

It was at this point (the 3.9 mile mark, checking my SmartCoach) that I noticed that I wasn't even supposed to be going 5 miles today. My training plan said 4 miles. Isn't that SO! FUNNY! Um... yeah, it wasn't to me at the time, either. But I was out for 5 and I had already planned to do 5 AND I had already told my Nike+ thing that I was doing 5 and I couldn't have that little piece of electronics mocking me, now could I?

So I kept going -- did I mention I was at the corner where I could have turned to come home? Or I could have kept going straight up a hill... Up the hill I went. Into the sun. I did decide not to add an extra loop and I was running less and walking more and, in short, dying. I convinced myself to run in little 30 second shuffles.

I finally was getting toward the end. Mainly the part where I was heading down the hill toward home. I didn't care what Nike+ said, I was just going home. Since I was heading down a hill I talked myself into going for broke and running for a whole 60 seconds.

As soon as I started running I saw Mr. Runner Dude coming around the corner towards me -- which meant... up the hill. More overweight than I am, pouring buckets of sweat like I was, but running the whole time. He's probably some awesome distance runner, just in what they call the "Clydesdale" division (and I am SO not entering a race that has a Clydesdale division for me -- I have a very brave friend that I shall not call out that faithfully reads my blog that entered a race and was in the Clydesdale division for her age group... and she's smaller than me!! I would. have. DIED!!)

When I passed him, I yelled, "Good job! We're doing it!" and truly hope he didn't think I considered myself some super-awesome runner being condescending to him. Oh, no. I hope he goes home and pops open the Gatorade and scouts out random blogs and happens across mine and finds out that he kept me running today -- because he chugged it UP the hill when I barely could run down at that point in my run.

So... thanks, Mr. Runner Dude. You never know when the little thing you're doing encourages someone else to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

P.S. I got in front of my house -- Nike+ read 4.90 miles. Doh! Went to the end of the street and back. Boom! Done...

God Won't Give You More Than You Can Handle...

I (texted) checked in with a friend going through a rough patch this week. Her husband has been struggling with his health and had a minor surgery but ended up back in the hospital this week. She is exhausted, as you can imagine. At one point, via text, she wrote, "I know God doesn't give us more than we can handle, but I think enough is enough." She, of course, included a smiley to let me know that she is fully submitting to the Lord's will and in it for the long haul.

Being a text conversation, I simply let her know she could call on me for anything they needed and I was praying, but I have pondered that oft-used phrase all week long: "God doesn't give us more than we can handle." I have thought it and said it myself.

Several years ago, however, I read a blog that gave me an entirely different perspective on it. And, as is the tragedy with blogs, I have no idea where I saw it, so I can't credit this person or even send you to her and we are all grieving that fact because she said this point far more eloquently than I will.

She had an ill child. Like ... potentially fatally ill. It was scary and she used this same phrase to a pastor that came to minister to her: "I know God doesn't give me more than I can bear, but I just don't think I can do this..."

The pastor encouraged her to look up the scripture that phrase is taken from: 1 Corinthians 10:13. It isn't talking about life struggle situations at all. It's talking about temptation. Perhaps we are using it in the wrong context:

"No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. " 1 Corinthians 10:13

The blogger went on to say (probably in my paraphrase), "God gives us situations all the time that we can't handle. We are to go to Him with them and let him bear them for us."

That has stuck with me through the years. It isn't always the time to correct someone's theology about the matter, but I want to encourage you to consider the point. You may be carrying something that you think you can't handle. Guess what? God may not intend for you to be carrying it alone.

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." John 16:33 (emphasis mine)

See? He promises us that we will have trouble. But he also reminds us that he is bigger than all of it. Oh, I am so grateful. It's only the world.

Matthew 19:26

Mark 10:27 and

Luke 1:37

all have a variation on the theme, "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible." (the one in Luke is spoken by the angel Gabriel so I think it's pretty cool!) Those are words I cling to when I am in the pit of time that I see no end in sight or way to break free. Luke 1:37, "For nothing is impossible with God." Nothing.

Whatever road you are walking today, God may have allowed you to have way more than you can handle alone. But NOTHING is impossible with God. Truth. And GLORY!

Starting Over -- One More Time -- and More Perspective

It is looming.

I'm still in my 30's, you know? :-) I am saying that as often as possible because in about 6 weeks I won't be able to say that.

A big birthday is looming. Last year, I wrote about some things I've learned in my 39 years on that birthday (don't expect another list this year -- I may have learned a few things this year, but not 40 more!)

A year ago when I turned 39, I was staring down 40 with my 'fight face'!! It was ON and I was going to win. I made goals for my running and set off to meet them. All went well until.... (cue dreadful music) an injury! Bummer. Recovered from the injury right around New Year's, so I was in the calendar year of the birthday, still staring it down (and from 9 months away). Big plans and goals. I was going to stomp this birthday into the ground, so fit would I be!

Well, again, if you're following along, you know that I have been laid low for weeks at a time battling migraines, then the headaches caused by treating the migraines (go figure). Started surfacing from that conundrum about the time I went on the mission trip with Ashley a few weeks ago, which I returned from with a horrific case of the creeping crud.

Here is where the perspective comes in: for my birthday, I would be so happy to go the whole day without a migraine, and to sleep through the night without a coughing fit. Forget how I look -- though one of those days would probably GREATLY improve the bags under my eyes -- and forget how much or how fast I can run -- that may upset the migraine balance. The battle with minor health problems has made me increasingly grateful for a day that I can go and do what I can when I can. For my 40th birthday, if I can still walk across the street unassisted, I'm good!

Starting over?

It's another Monday, another day that, for this precise moment in time, I feel relatively healthy. I am lacing up my running shoes and starting over. Almost from absolute square one. I wish I knew how many 'do-over' Mondays I've started over with my running this year alone, let alone in my lifetime. Here's the deal: I will not stop. God has granted me one more day, and for today, the health to try to tackle it.

Am I frustrated that the November me (before I got hurt) could run circles around this starting over me? Not really, honestly. I guess there was a moment in time when I spent more time looking back at where I had been, and why can't I still be there, blah, blah. But now that just wastes too much time/ energy. This is where I am. This is today. I do the best I can. I train and run and make the most of today's workout while I can -- I don't know when my health will allow me to do it again. But I can't spend time kicking myself for not being where I was or where I want to be or where I should be.

This is me. Starting over, and grateful for the grace that allows me the day and the health to do it.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Romans 12:1

Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed,

for his compassions never fail.

They are new every morning;

great is your faithfulness.

Lamentations 3:22,23

Encourage One Another

I really wanted to actually write my 'acknowledgement' page of my yet-to-be-published (or completely written, or entirely thought-through) book, but for now you will simply have to bear with me as I make a few thanks.

You never know what simple little word(s) will carry someone through for the day, perhaps even for a lifetime. There is one precious young mom (young -- she's about my age, but we met when we were young) in Temple where we used to live who, to this day, talks about how much she remembers one sentence of kindness uttered to her ... about 8 or 9 years ago. I have ZERO recollection of those words, but they must have carried her through when needed.

Too often, I recall others' words of hurt and devaluing. Sadly, too often I also remember my own words that sling hurt and belittle others.

This last week I have not been thinking of hurtful words. I have been thinking of building words.

I think of my friend Robin, tiny and soft-spoken, patting the table for emphasis (other people would slap the table, but Robin is genteel and therefore will pat the table as patting a precious baby) while her blue eyes bore a hole in my heart, "You are a writer. You are. You are a writer." (part of why this matters is Robin's background -- she knows writers). This was last summer at a wedding reception, but those 10 words have helped me put one foot in front of the other MANY times in the last 9 months.

I have thought of the precious souls --- all of you people!! --- wrote encouraging words as I tossed out my God-dream. You have NO idea how much each of those meant to me. Some I keep coming back to re-read. Lisa Laree, to remind me that my writing caused her to keep coming back -- well, that was an "apple of gold in a setting of silver".

I think of sweet Lynn B., who I (along with my husband) look WAY up to, and not just because he's real tall. He has consistently blessed me with kind words about my talents, and continues to do so and be a quiet but consistent cheerleader.

Then there's Angela, who not only offered encouraging words, but is helping me refine my skill. There's Christy, who offered to get me in touch with published-author-friend so I can hear the ins and outs. There are SO many of you, Craig, Aralee, Brooke, Kim, and others that pop in from facebook and write very encouraging words.

And there's the 'old-standby's-- those close to me that are sometimes overlooked because, in my heart, they HAVE to be nice to me! :-) My parents, my husband, my coffee group, my church family -- all consistent cheerleaders.

I can't name every name, I can't think of every time, but this I do know: I would never have tried this writing thing without those words. I would have quit long ago, and never looked back. Satan's words of doubt would have won if not for the constant chatter of those around me in sprinklings throughout my week: "You have a gift." "You did it again -- great work." "I love what you said."

So, if you have ever spoken one word of encouragement to ANYONE -- thank you. You never know, but you may have been the ONE voice to keep that person going for that one day.

"A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver." Proverbs 25:11