Strong In My Weakness

I caved. I gave in. I broke.

I just broke a 20 day streak without Diet Coke at lunch today.

Starting over.

Please don't feel obligated to tell me all the ways Diet Coke is horrible for me to try to encourage me to break my habit. I know.

By Evan-Amos (Own work) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

 As a migraine sufferer, I gave up Diet Coke "for good" in 2010. In my prolific reading about migraines and triggers, one point made sense to me: any triggers that you can get out of your life, you should, and caffeine addiction is an obvious one. This particular author recommended that migraine sufferers put down caffeine and never return to it. I did, and felt better.

(Yes, caffeine is used to treat migraines. Different story. I am happy to discuss what I know about migraines with you if you are interested. Email me.)

Made it all the way until June, too. Don't know why I took a sip or two of Satan's milk. But I did. And there you go. I was a goner. That six month stretch is the longest I've had since (but that also is when Troy lost his job, so trying to give up my serious addiction in the face of unemployment, then long-distance marriage/ single-motherhood/ house for sale, then move/ relocating teenagers.

January is when I tried (AGAIN) to really get off of it for good. I went a little too cold turkey on a rainy, hormonal week and kept a migraine for about 5 days, but I was NOT turning back at that point.

Last year, one (of my four) words for the year was "gentleness." This struggle has given me gentleness with those struggling with real addictions. If I can't lay down my bubbly goodness for more than 20 days, then I am sure not going to throw stones at people trying to walk away from tobacco, alcohol, a prescription they've found they rely on, or anything like that.

The Lord is also leading me to see that, though I am a healthy eater, I (still) have some food addictions I'm not quite ready to give up. Foods that I know aren't the best fuel for my workouts or body, but I just flat don't want to walk away from. I believe with all my heart (when it comes to types of food) that “ 'Everything is permissible'–but not everything is beneficial." (1 Cor. 10:23). And as I try to do what is most beneficial for me in my food choices, I find that I am very, very weak.


A friend urged me to claim 2 Corinthians 12: 9, 10 for this year:

"But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.
That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong" 2 Corinthians 12:9,10 

Um... that's not very fun. But oh, so true. And I have seen the many many ways God will work if I will remember that He is strong in my weakness.

This sounds pretty heavy for one cup of Diet Coke, huh?


So... I'm taking suggestions on how to completely walk away from this habit. Starting over...NOW. I'm considering paying myself $1 or $2 (the cost of one out) when I am super tempted. When I break 20 days again, I'll either treat myself to something fun or keep saving up for something big. 

I think I used to be more strong-willed than this and just got tired. What about you? Strong willed? Habit you're trying to break? Want an accountability partner? I'm in!

Happy New Week!

What an amazingly gorgeous weekend God blessed us with. And I confess I spent precious little of it outside, but I got a little rest, and more importantly, I got a new car.

Old news to those of you on facebook and Twitter, but, yes, we managed to get a new-to-us car before the Expedition completely dropped dead. I can now drive carpool without my stomach being in knots wondering if I will make it back to the house.

We got a Maxima. And, it's still 3 years old (Expedition was 9) but, hey, some things have changed in vehicles since 2000! It's bluetooth capable, so I can punch a button on my steering wheel, say, "call Troy office" and voila, I'm talkin' to Troy (or, more likely, his answering machine -- I can't ever catch him in the office). The seat moves out to let me out when I park, then back in when I start the engine -- like my own personal concierge!

Yes, I am country gone big city in my car! Driving around like Gomer Pyle saying, "Goooolllleee! What will they think of next?" Just craziness. And such a blessing.

Riley, my, um, petite-ish 11 year old is thrilled that the airbag will shut itself off when a petite-ish person is sitting in the front seat. At 80 pounds, his life's longing has been to sit in the front seat for a while. We already have a fight-reducing plan for that!

Part of my weekend was birthday-celebrating my friend Denise. Some of us from Coffee Group gathered for a brunch and laughed together. Donna pointed out how wonderful it was that we all knew -- Denise doesn't do cheese, I don't do coffee and my Diet Coke was chilling for me when I got there. I hope I never take for granted that I am blessed with a group of women that know. Not just my Diet Coke affinity (if you've been at the COTR for very long, you know that) but my history, my hurts, my peeves, my soapboxes, my laughter triggers. I am amazingly blessed in that group.

I also made a blog roll. Donna, it's quite tasty. Give it a try! I'm sure I've forgotten someone. Please leave a comment and let me know if you don't see you on there!

So here we are on Monday morning. Ever since I have been home with the kids when Ashley was born, I have LOVED Mondays. When the kids were little bitty, Sundays were SO hard, and Monday was a day to re-group, clean up, and relax. Even with the jobs I've had since the kids have been in school, I still generally love Mondays. It's a fairly unscheduled day, and it's kind of like every week's New Year's Day -- you get to start it all over, get a fresh start, try to get it right this time. Ever hopeful, I guess.

I think I'm looking forward to a little big easier schedule than I had last week. But I always am just a little lonely without my family that I enjoyed over the weekend -- it's never quite enough for me.

In July I will be joining my daughter and 19 other 7th and 8th graders on a mission trip to South Texas. Those of us going -- parents and youth alike -- are required to attend training time and part of that is scripture memory. So I am memorizing Ephesians 2:10 right now:

For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

God has prepared some good work for you to do today! You are His workmanship! May you find His strength and might to do the good works He has prepared for you.