I have been guilty of reading a blog for months, perhaps even envying this seemingly perfect life the blogger has going for her, then she will up and confess that things have really been difficult at her house, and she has really been struggling with 'x', 'y', and/or 'z'...
"How can that be?" I'll wonder... "You've been here blogging all these great and wonderful things, some of them so funny and/or insightful. You can't be struggling."
Then the shoe will land on the other foot. Someone will tell me what an awesome marriage I seem to have, how great my kids must be, whatever. Um... of course. And, again, since I haven't been blogging this doesn't hold as much weight -- it could leave you to wonder where all I've been and if we are okay (if you have given us a second thought and honestly, I don't expect to cross your mind ever at all...).
When I do blog regularly, or facebook, or Twitter, or however else I communicate -- I will leave you with the impression that all is super-great with my family. And that is a delicate balance for me. If you know me even a very little bit, you will know that I am 100% about being authentic -- whether I know you virtually or really, I think you deserve to see and know who I really am, "warts and all" as it were.
However, my commitment to authenticity only goes as far as my obligation to my family -- not only to protect them physically, but to protect their spirits and hearts. I will not use the internet as a sounding board or a place to air our squabbles or vent about what's going on over here, or whose breathing is loudest, or who currently needs to curb the eye-rolling or whatever. Those things all blow over and get outgrown -- but float around the internet FOREVER. I won't do that to my family. If it's a funny story, I will check first. This story? (not mine) I never would have told on myself or my husband. But I HOPE she checked with him before she posted -- because it is HILARIOUS and allows us to see her as a real person.
So in the absence of turmoil, sometimes it appears that all is roses when we may or may not be shutting doors a little too firmly over here, and there may or may not be threats of no technology if the huffing and eye rolling doesn't stop. And... since I won't share family turmoil here... ummmmmmmm... maybe something funny will happy at swimming lessons that I can tell you, or perhaps you will suddenly develop an overzealous interest in my hip pain caused by walk/ running 11 miles.
So... check back later for warm fuzzies, maybe drama, and all manner of fun!
3 comments:
Back in the fall, one of the things Tony said to me is, "This is a SHAM!!! Everyone thinks we've got it altogether, and we don't." My reply was, "Do you SERIOUSLY think that EVERYONE you believe to have a perfect marriage/family/life/job/finances has it? EVERYONE lives a 'sham' if you think perfection is the standard."
Can't wait to hear the latest swimming lesson funny.
I totally love blogs and people that are open and transparent. Sometimes I worry that I tell too much, but it hasn't stopped me yet.
I get what you're saying. Blogging is therapeutic for me but I also know I have to pay attention to what I say so I don't unwillingly hurt my family or put them in a bad light.
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