Medals of Martyrdom

The political climate recently has been talking about medals earned in combat and whether they were deserved or not and who exactly decided a medal should be awarded. It has given me opportunity to stop and think about the medals that I award myself.
Almost three years ago our family moved to a new town. Six months later, our house flooded. Shortly after that, we were sued. Shortly after that, we learned my husband’s mother was terminally ill. Shortly after that – well, you get the idea. Let me just say that it has been almost five months since our last major crisis. I have learned not to breathe a sigh of relief, but to run for cover. I was never promised this life would be easy. Why, then, must I share my "medal of honor" for suffering and grief with all around me. I have learned that I want to award myself a "medal of martyrdom" to show people how strong I was while I was suffering and going through trials. The trials, large and small, begin to pile up like trash on your front porch. If you refuse to let them go, forgiving when necessary, grieving when necessary, then your porch will end up REALLY trashy.
Sometimes it’s difficult to let go of the bitterness of hardships and not want to show the world your trash, your battle scars. I find that frequently I want to wear my trials on my sleeve like a medal that shows what all I have survived. I am missing the blessings of my trials – the lessons I have learned about God’s faithfulness, the fellow warriors that God has sent me to pray me through, my children seeing their parents cry out to God on a regular basis –when I only want to tell people about how painful they were.
I also have learned that ‘forgiving and forgetting’ is a myth created by the world. Forgiveness isn’t. Absolutely not. Forgiveness of others is a natural by-product of loving them as God loves them and knowing how much God has forgiven me. But forgetting – doesn’t happen. God blesses us with those memories, but to use for His glory. Those memories, which can sometimes be painful enough to give you opportunity to forgive all over again, can be used to minister to others. That’s where I want to keep my ‘survivor medals’ – tucked away to be used as ministry opportunities arise.
As I find myself awarding myself those "medals of martyrdom" I am reminded again to clear the trash off my porch. God can do it. Sometimes it takes frequent prayers to forgive and love as He loves. But God will be faithful, as always, and we won’t have to rely on our self-awarded medals. We can wait for the crown He will award.
1 Peter 4:12-15,19
"Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed. If you are insulted because of the name of Christ, you are blessed, for the Spirit of glory and of God rests on you. If you suffer, it should not be as a murderer or thief or any other kind of criminal, or even as a meddler. . . .So then, those who suffer according to God’s will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good."

Aroma of Christ

When was the last time you were sniffed? By a human? Up until about a month ago, the answer for me would have had to have been never. But life brings new experiences daily and this particular day did not disappoint. Leaving a summer job of teaching swimming lessons with my two children, my errand list necessitated that we stop at a discount store that will remain nameless, but one that I loathe entering. One of my stops in the monstrosity of discount was the shoe department, where a very helpful lady helped me locate swim shoes so that I wouldn’t tear up my feet teaching swimming lessons. She very kindly led me to the swim shoes, showed me my selection, then turned to me and sniffed. Yes, she sniffed me. Two quick, polite whiffs. Her comment was, "Have you been at the pool?" Now, how do you answer that? And if she works in the shoe department, shouldn’t she be thankful to be smelling sunscreen and chlorine instead of feet?
2 Corinthians tells us that we are continually ‘sniffed’ in this world: "For we are to God the aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing. To the one we are the smell of death; to the other, the fragrance of life." Me? The aroma of Christ? In my heart, I’m far more likely to be the aroma of sunscreen and chlorine, dinner cooking, or dirty laundry. But as I toss aside all of those things and make my way to the foot of the throne, I am less and He is more. My earthly aroma of selfishness, pride, and impatience is taken away as I let Him replace it with the sweet fragrance of Christ’s love.
The difficult task is to continually return to the throne. To be the aroma of Christ without daily (sometimes hourly) trips before His throne would work as well as being the aroma of clean without a daily shower.
My constant prayer is that I look less like me and more like Him. So, I suppose now I shall also pray to smell more like Him, too. After all, I would love for someone to sniff me and ask, "Have you been at His throne?"

What I Know About Migraine

Because my experience with migraine has led me to become somewhat of an expert on my own migraines, I wanted to share what I know here. Obviously, this is not medical advice, but I will tell you that I had to learn far more on my own than my doctor has been able to tell me. More than anything, if you are a migraine sufferer, I encourage you to do your own homework and research and discover your own solutions, rather than assume that a health care professional will do it for you. 

Most of the information that worked FOR ME I got from this book:

Author Bucholz has, just as the title suggests, a 3-step program to virtually eliminating migraines. I am writing this only two weeks past my last migraine, but I am confident I am on the right track. You can find MANY books out there on migraines -- I bought another while I was at it -- and you will probably get conflicting advice. This one worked for me and made logical sense to me.

Step 1: Eliminate Quick Fixes.

This means (to me, especially) wean yourself off of all caffeine and all (can you believe it) prescription migraine pills. Did you know that prescription migraine pills have a rebounding effect, and can cause migraines? Lovely. I didn't know, and my doctor didn't tell me (he may not know, for that matter...). We all know that caffeine does that which is why we get headaches when we go too long without, etc. To eliminate caffeine headaches, Bucholz says it's okay to 'wean', but make it quick, 'lest you spend your life in a 'really, I'm drinking less today than yesterday, so I'm weaning' pattern. He says make it where you are completely off  caffeine in 10 days or less. Also, he says take no more than two prescription migraine pills a month (I was taking 12-15) to avoid rebounding. For all other headaches, use ibuprofen or acetaminophen (there is much about acetaminophen being VERY hard on the liver, and as much as I need, I try to stick with ibuprofen) and use an ice pack on your head. 

This is a ROUGH two-week de-tox (longer for some folks), but well worth it.

Step 2: Eliminate Potential Food Triggers

Bucholz has a list of common food triggers and says you should get off of ALL of them and here's why (even if you don't think they are a trigger):

There are so many triggers that we can't avoid (weather changes, hormones, environmental factors, stress, etc.) that we should take extra precaution to know and avoid the triggers that we CAN avoid. Also, many people are unaware that a food is a trigger because for instance, let's say that a storm is coming in (classic migraine trigger), hormones are raging (classic migraine trigger), and you had a horribly stressful day at work (classic migraine trigger). You get home from work without a migraine and eat a slab of chocolate (classic migraine trigger). The chocolate is the 'straw that broke the camel's back' and sends you to bed for the night with a migraine. Three days later, when the storm has passed, hormones have leveled off, and it's your day off, you finish off the chocolate and... nothing. So, you think, "Whew! So glad chocolate isn't a trigger!" 

So, Bucholz says to get off of all of these and stay off. He said for 4 months. I confess I started 'cheating' after about 2 weeks, thinking, "I really miss this, and I really don't think THIS is one of MY triggers." Guess what? Found a trigger! Almonds! 

Without any further ado, la list (in order of how frequently they are a trigger for people according to Bucholz): (a copy of the list)

• caffeine (he includes decaffeinated drinks due to the chemicals used to take the caffeine out as well as the amount of caffeine left in)
• chocolate
• Monosodium Glutamate (MSG) -- no bacon, sausage, and few prepared meats
• processed meats and fish
• cheese and other dairy, including yogurt and sour cream
• Nuts and nut butters
• Alcohol and vinegar, especially red wine, even condiments made with vinegar (ketchup)
• a vague array of fruits and juices (mentioning citrus)
• a vague array of vegetables
• fresh bread (less than one day old)
• Aspartame/ Nutrasweet
• anything that YOU find that gives you a headache

Some things about this: he recommends to go off of ALL of these things, then slowly add back in only the things you actually miss (he says things you don't miss aren't really worth it, which is why I still haven't had yogurt!) HOWEVER, his one caveat: he says that caffeine is simply too much trouble, and anyone that suffers from migraine should get off of it, stay off of it, and never re-introduce it. You know, I don't miss the feel -- I especially don't miss feeling crummy later in the day. I miss the taste. Oh, heavenly days, I miss the taste. Seriously, licking my lips as I type. It helps that my preventative that I take has changed the way Diet Coke tastes, so even if I were to drink one, it isn't my old friend Diet Coke. But, oh, I miss it so....

I have been off of caffeine about 6 weeks. I can honestly say that I can go without it for the rest of my life, but I don't know if I can go the rest of my life only drinking water, which is pretty much all that is available to me currently (once you eliminate high calorie, Aspartame, and caffeine). It's pretty boring.

Oh, one more: he also says that pizza, due to being yeasty, full of cheese and if it has meat on it, MSG, can be one of the worst things for a migraine sufferer. It doesn't seem to bother me. FYI. Whew...

Step 3: Raise your Threshold.

This means, basically, go to your doctor and get on a preventative. Which, to be honest, I did first, and would highly recommend doing BEFORE you go through all of the detoxing, what-have-you because it can also reduce the severity of migraine symptoms. However, like any other medication, these are not without side effects. Mine has been a God-send, but I can't rely on it as the be-all, end-all savior to end my migraines. Also, I am on one that my doctor said, "Start at this dosage, and go up dosage every week until migraines are almost eliminated." Well, by the time migraines were almost eliminated, I felt HORRIBLE 24/7. Vague headache, no energy, just terrible. I felt so bad, it took me two weeks to realize this: "At the lower dosage, I did have 3 migraines in a week, but I actually felt good for the other 4 days!" I went to the lower dosage, and have now had 1 migraine in the last two weeks. A HUGE victory for me.

My doctor wants me at the higher dosage -- I don't know why -- but I'm perfectly happy here. Truthfully, I will stay here a few months and maybe see if I can get off of this and control migraine by diet.

So. My migraine life. Happy to share what I know. There are many alternatives that I wish I could afford to try -- accupuncture, for example -- but for now simply eliminating certain foods and being good to myself seem to be working. 

I'll be happy to answer any of your questions -- it would work best if you would leave me your email address -- but keep in mind I am NOT a medical professional, and I would encourage you to keep doing your own research with a medical professional.